Violence, Booze and too much family
by Marieko
Summary: What will happen when the Urimeshi team meet three young girls with powers that rival theirs? one things for sure: it will be hilarious!
1. The incounter

Author: Hello! This is my first YuYu Hakusho fanfic (on this site)!

Setsuna: Don't blame us if it sucks

Author: -hits Setsuna over the head- I'll have you know that lots of people like my fanfics! Besides, it's that kind of negativity that makes most people dislike you.

Raye: Are you sure it's not the cold attitude and the proneness towards alcoholism?

Setsuna: Hey! Those are some of my best traits!

Author: Anyway, I don't own anyone but Setsuna. I co-own Bunny, Raye and Tempest. I hope you enjoy my story!

In a city as large as Japan, there were many low-rent apartments standing ready for suspicious tenants. One such apartment had just been rented out to three innocent enough looking teenage girls. It was cramped, but somehow each girl had her own room. The apartment was sparse, each bedroom equipped with nothing but a futon, the living room only holding a beat up couch and old tv.

From one of the bedrooms came a voice. "Bunny! Where did you put my booze?" yelled a seventeen year old girl who was bending over an open suitcase, sifting through the junk crammed into it. She had blue and silver streaked hair that was pulled back into a long pony tail. Her eyes were electric blue that stood out on her pale skin. She was wearing cut off jeans, cut to short shorts that were slung low on her curvaceous hips. Her top was a light blue wife beater with the words 'Insanity's my friend' scrawled onto it with what appeared to be sharpie. Her feet were bare while her wrists, fingers, neck and ears were heavily decorated in silver jewelry.

"I didn't." said a cold voice in the next room "It would have weighed us down. I left it."

"What?" The girl's eyes bugged out and she stood up, revealing her height to be close to six foot. "Please tell me you're joking!" She ran into the other room and stared down at the short silver haired girl. Her hair was short in the back, with longer chunks in the front framing her face. This eighteen year-old had reddish-gray eyes and skin more pale than the blue haired girl in front of her. She was wearing baggy black pants and a tight long-sleeved red shirt that said 'Save the trees from the hippies'. She was very petite, with a boyish figure that was hidden by her clothes. Her feet were covered in black steel toed boots. Around her neck was a long silver chain, on the end of which had a crystallized flame hanging from it. Around her forehead she had a black bandana. "Please tell me you didn't really leave it!"

"Okay. I didn't leave it." she said her cold stare never blinking.

The taller girl slid to the floor. "Bunny, How could you? You know how much alcohol means to me."

Bunny rolled her eyes. "Setsuna you are such a dumbass. You need to get over yourself."

Setsuna stood up, putting her hands on her hips. "Fine as soon as YOU give up ice-cream, which can be an addiction too you know!"

Bunny paled and her red eyes glared. "Never!"

"Nope, too bad. If I can't have my Vodka, then you can't have your strawberry ice-cream." Setsuna stalked to the fridge, Bunny right behind her. Setsuna opened the freezer and turned on the water faucet, holding a box of strawberry ice-cream above the sink.

"You wouldn't dare!" growled the other girl. Setsuna threw the box into the sink, squishing the ice-cream out to run down the drain in a pink mess. Bunny growled and launched herself into the air, punching her sister in the face. Setsuna backed up and kicked out, her foot connecting with her opponent's shin.

At that moment a sixteen year old girl with long dark blue hair walked in. She had blue eyes, the right one having a slit of silver in it. Her skin was slightly darker than the other girls. She wore black jeans and a midnight blue t-shirt with safety pins randomly put in it. The shirt was stretched tight over her large chest, while the jeans hugged her smaller hips. Her shoes were scuffed up tennis shoes and she had a select few shiny pieces of jewelry decorating her. "Guys! We've only been here five minutes and you're already fighting! Can't you people get along for one moment?" She scolded.

"It's her fault." Setsuna pointed at Bunny.

"Is not! You shouldn't have thrown away my ice-cream." Bunny hmphed and crossed her arms "You shouldn't mess with my sweet snow."

The blue haired girl rolled her dark blue eyes. They stood there a minute just looking at each other then the girl who had broken up the fight said. "Okay! Who wants to go outside and explore!"

Her older sisters sweat dropped. "Raye! We have better things to do than explore!" yelled Setsuna.

"Oh yeah? What?" muttered Bunny. They all stood there silent for a second thinking.

"We could go get me some booze." suggested Setsuna.

"No 'Suna. No. We have a job to do." said Bunny.

Setsuna looked dejected for a moment then said. "Fine. So what exactly is our job, oh boring one?"

Bunny glared but said "Tempest said we needed to meet someone. She said they would be at the square all day today."

"And how would our loving sister know that?" replied a miffed 'Suna.

"'Cause the spirits told her." replied Bunny. 'Suna huffed. Again there was a little silence as Setsuna pouted.

"Let's go!" said Raye.

"Oh," Suna said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Well if 'the spirits' said it, it must be true. I mean Tempest isn't always the most reliable person, remember that time in Istanbul? Holy Grail my ass. And how exactly are we supposed to recognize this person, if there even is a person?" When she looked up to see what her sisters would answer she realized they had left already. "HEY!" she yelled "Wait for me!" she ran after them after slipping on her platform black flip-flops.

She practically jumped down the stairs in her haste to get to the parking lot. Her sisters were already by their car, an old looking van painted a light blue.

When Setsuna reached her sisters she paused, trying to catch her breath. When she succeeded she took out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. "You know you guys, you shouldn't have left me. I made a good point- how are we going to recognize the mystery people?" Suna asked, taking a drag off of her newly lit cigarette.

"We will worry about that later." said Raye, hopping into the passenger seat.

"Whatever." said Setsuna "I'll drive" she says as she passes Bunny.

"Hn." was all Bunny would say. They drove off, leaving their new apartment in a cloud of dust.

"So where is the square?" asked Setsuna.

"Go straight until you get to Orange Street then take a left. Drive on until you see a big sign that says THE SQUARE" said Raye said yawning.

Setsuna glanced at her sister "Are you tired already? Did you have less sugar than usual?

"Yeah, I only had a pound." answered her sister

"That's a dangerously low amount." Setsuna said sarcastically. "I think I may have some Kool-Aid in the glove compartment.

Raye reached in and pulled out about a thermos containing cherry Kool-Aid "Awesome." she swallowed it down in almost one gulp.

It is at that point they reach the square.

"I sense something." said Bunny from the back seat. "I'm guessing it is the people we are supposed to meet."

"YAY!" said Raye as she jumped out of the car.

Suna turned off the engine and stepped out into the sun, slipping on sunglasses. "I just hope we don't have to kill them this time." she said

Author: yeah, I'm revising all this AGAIN… I'm special…


	2. She coulda been a killer

Author: so yeah, I'm revising this story, getting all of the spelling/grammar errors changed, and updating my information… it's amazing…

Setsuna, Raye and Bunny were standing at the square, scanning the crowd.

"I can't get a good enough reading on the energy spike. Can you tell who it is Bunny?" asked Setsuna from behind her mirrored sunglasses.

"Hm." was the only response she got.

"Isn't that them? The guys by the candy store?" pointed out a sugar-hyped Raye. She jumped up and down, even though at five foot seven she could see over most of the heads.

Setsuna looked down at her twitching sister "Don't try and sneak into that store, any more sugar and you might blow up." teased 'Suna.

Raye glared up at her sister. "You're the one who gave me the Kool-Aid." She said coldly. When they looked up they realized Bunny was already half-way to the boys. Her sisters ran to catch up. When they caught up to Bunny all three of them slowly walked to four boys.

One was significantly shorter than the others, only a little taller than Bunny, not counting his gravity-defying black hair. He had red eyes, the only colour in his black outfit, which included black pants with too many belts than was necessary to hold them up. His shirt appeared to be a black and badly torn. He had a white bandana over his forehead and black boots.

Another had long red hair and green eyes. He was quite tall and pale. He was wearing a fuchsia school uniform and tennis shoes.

The third had black hair that was slicked back. He was wearing a green school uniform and tennis shoes. His eyes were a chocolate brown.

The last one had orange hair in an Elvis like 'doo if Elvis used rubber cement for hair jell, blue eyes and a matching blue school uniform.

"Jeeze, fashion disaster much?" muttered Setsuna

The girls stopped right in front of the boys. Bunny and the short one glared at each other, sizing each other up. (Tehe that's funny cause their so short) Raye stood, looking around at everyone. The red head especially caught her eye.

Setsuna just glared at them all, her lit cigarette in hand until her nose caught a familiar smell. "You!" she yelled pointing at the boy with slicked back hair. "You have booze! Hand it over!"

The boy's companions all looked at him. "What?" He asked, meeting his friend's glairs.

"Come on!" growled 'Suna "I haven't had any alcohol since this morning's breakfast. All because SOMEONE-" she glared at Bunny "Didn't pack any." The boys looked at the girls like they were crazy (they are but that is irrelevant.) Setsuna glared one more time before leaping on her opponent and wrestled him to the ground. She straddled him and looked through his pockets until she found what she was looking for. She sat back with the bottle of sake and gulped down the whole bottle in about three seconds. She put down the bottle and sighed. "Now was that so hard?" she asked patting the guy she was straddling on the stomach. She stood, getting off of the poor shmuch who got his sake stolen.

When Setsuna looked to her sisters she saw they were both glaring at her with their arms crossed. "What?" Suna said confused "Ooooh. I'm sorry I've been rude haven't I?" She said turning to the boys "My name's Setsuna, these are my sisters Bunny and Raye." She said smiling. When no one said anything her smile wavered. "This is where you guys say what your names are." She prompted.

"They are probably in shock from you jumping him." pointed out Bunny in a monotone voice, her silver eyebrow raised.

"Well, I wouldn't have had to do it if he had just given me the booze, but NOOOOO we had to do it the hard way." she explained making perfect since only to herself. "Now can we get off of the subject of my addiction and onto these four." She said pointing to the guys.

"Oh yes... My name is Minamo Suichi. The one you uh... attacked is Urimeshi Yusuke. This is Hiei-" He pointed to the silent pointy haired midget "And this is-"

"Kazuma Kuwabara the toughest guy around, at your service pretty ladies!" The orange haired guy said pushing his way up from the back of the group. The girls didn't look very impressed.

Yusuke hit Kuwabara in the back of his head, making him fall forward. "Shut up Kuwabara. I could beat you to a bloody pulp any day of the week."

"Damn you Urimeshi! one of these days I will beat you!"

"So, if you don't mind me asking, what exactly do you want with us?" asked the ever polite Kurama.

"I don't know." The Urimeshi team took an anime fall.

"Whada you mean you don't know?" Yusuke yelled at Bunny.

"What I said. You got a hearing problem? Some ghost told my sis we were supposed to meet you guys here." shrugged Bunny.

"A GHOST TOLD YOU? You come here and physically attack me and YOU DO IT CAUSE A VOICE INSIDE SOME NUT-JOB'S HEAD TELLS YOU TO?"

"One: The ghost didn't tell 'Suna to attack you, she does that on her own and Two: has anyone ever told you that you turn a funny shade of purple when you're angry?" said a laughing Raye.

"I think you're the most normal. How old are you?" said Kuwabara

"I'm only 777 years old. Although I am older than you'll ever be." said Raye-chan.

Kuwabara's eyes bugged out "777! why do you look so young?"

Raye sighed "We're like demons." she frowned "That's not right. We are more like a race of our own. We age differently. I'm the youngest, 'Suna is 779 and Bunny is 799."

"WAHH?" Kuwabara took a step back.

"Don't be such an idiot. The red head's soul is pretty damn old. And him-" Bunny glared at Hiei for a second before finishing. "His spirit says age as well." She glanced at the remaining boys and shook her head.

"I have a question." said Raye. "If you guys are both demon and human why are you working together? Who are you?"

"Isn't it obvious Raye? These are the famous Spirit detectives. They work for Koenma." Bunny said sourly.

"Huh." said Setsuna "If that's so I wonder... Well I know why we are here, to find you but why are you here? Shouldn't you be on a case or something?"

"We are. Where 'sposed to find three female demon-thingy's and capture them." Kuwabara said. The two groups looked at each other for a second as reason dawned. "Hey!-" was all Kuwabara got out before the three sisters took off.

"See ya, and thank you for the booze!" said Setsuna while running to the car.


	3. The wild hunt

Author: Last time you read this story the girls were getting into their cars while the YYH gang were chasing after them.

Setsuna: I think they can remember the last chapter

Author: Ya never know, they could have as bad a memory as you

Setsuna: I'm not the one with a bad memory! That's you

Author: Oh yeah i forgot! Anyway enjoy story.

* * *

Setsuna got in the drivers seat and started the engine. She put her foot down on the accelerator and they were off! "Damn it Bunny! Is this Tempest's idea of a joke?! She sent us there to get chased after by a bunch of spirit detectives!"

In her head an angry voice said, "HAY!! Don't shoot the messenger! I only tell you what the spirits say! It's not my fault they were on a mission!"

Setsuna swerved "What the heck? Are you trying to give me a heart attack Tempest? Do you want us all to die?" to that comment there came no reply

"Uh guys? They're following us." pointed out Raye.

"Which car?" asked Bunny quietly.

"The red one." said Raye with a look of pleasure in her eyes. "Whatcha gonna do?"

Bunny smiled an evil smile. "You'll see."

To the Urimeshi mobile!

"What's that smell?" asked Kuwabara

"Whoever smelt it dealt it!" Yusuke finished the litany.

"It smells like burning metal." pointed out Kurama. "I think your car might be on fire Yusuke."

"WHAT THE HECK?!"

Back to Setsuna's car

"Good work Bunny-chan that should distract them" No sooner had Setsuna uttered those words than the fire was put out. "What the-"

"They have a fire demon. It was the short one." explained Bunny.

"Your one to talk. Midget." said Suna. Bunny got an angry look on her face.

"Hello? We are on the same side here!" yelled Raye.

"Fine if Bunny can't burn them. We will just have to lose them." The car jerked forward and Raye went careening into her seat belt, almost getting decapitated. Bunny was pressed into her seat. Setsuna smiled. "Hold on tightly kittens. I've been described as Satan on crack when I'm driving!"

In Urimeshi's car

"Damn that Bitch is fast!" said Yusuke. They were now about 5 cars behind and falling back fast. "Which one is driving?" He muttered.

"It's the tall one." answered Hiei

"Grr. I'm gonna get her for stealing my sake!" The car whammed forward, gaining three cars. Everyone was jerked in their seats. Yusuke smiled.

in Sets' car

"There gaining!"

"I see that Raye."

"We're about to get on a clear patch on free way, there won't be any other cars." pointed out Bunny.

Again, Setsuna smiled "Perrrfect" she purred.

In Yusuke's car

"No more cars are left." said Kurama.

"Yeah. I'm gonna catch her and ram her off the road." all of the sudden they felt a crash and they were all jerked in their seats again. They saw the car that hit them, the driver smiling evilly.

"Looks like they have the same idea."

To Setsuna's car

"What the heck are you doing?!" yelled a Raye who was holding her head and glaring at the seat that attacked her.

"Ramming him off the road. What does it look like I'm doing?" Again there was an impact as Yusuke rammed the car. "Shit. He's good. But not good enough." Setsuna jerked the steering wheel, making the car spin, in the process gaining enough momentum to jam the other car into a ditch; unfortunately the car hit a patch of slick road and spun out of control. They also landed in the ditch.

* * *

Author: sooooo… I actually drive like that… I am Satan on crack… which is why I get people to drive me around cause I kinda don't want to die… just because… 


	4. He's so unusual

Author: Wow. I'm on a roll!

Marie: Cinnamon roll?

Cherry: okay. Hunny? It's bad when you think of food right after ever word.

Marie: Foooooood.

Cherry: Idiot

Author: viewers I'd like you to meet some of my other personalities… okay that's that, enjoy the show!

* * *

For a minuet no one moved. Bunny and Raye pushed open their doors. Raye was carrying Setsuna's passed out body. They collapsed on the ground and were about to get back up when a voice behind them said. "And where do you think you are going?" They turned around to see a triumphant Yusuke, a battered Kuwabara and Kurama carrying a passed out Hiei.

"We are going to leave you in one piece and go back home." replied Bunny.

"Do you really think you can win? It's three against two." Said Kurama.

"That may be so but the one you are carrying was one of your most strongest. Do you really think you could beat us alone?" said Bunny coldly.

"Yeah why is Hiei all passed out anyway?" asked Kuwabaka.

"Because. It took him a supreme amount of strength to fight my flames. A car accident was too much for him." explained Bunny. It is at this point the boys notice a black bandana covering Bunny's forehead, looking eerily close to the one Hiei had on his head.

"Whoa! You have the third eye thingy too?" asked Kuwabara.

"Yes. I have the same powers as your little fire apparition. And more"

"It doesn't matter; we still out number you." said Yusuke.

"Yes you do." said Raye. "But it's not quantity that matters. Its quality. I might be the youngest, but that does not mean I'm not strong." she said. "I have more powers than you can imagine"

Suddenly the Urimeshi team's vision went dark. They saw a field with Raye-chan standing in it. At first they thought she had dyed her hair red. That was, until something thicker plopped onto the shoulder. It was blood. The thing that was most frightening was the look on the young girls face. It was a look of pure bliss. "Of course." said a voice in their heads as they resurfaced from the memory. "There were unusual circumstances that led to that, and I was not completely in my own mind, but that is how much power I am capable of."

Bunny came up from behind her sister. "You've already seen my power zap your fire apparition. If I were you I'd run back to your Koenma and tell him if he wants to talk to us to come in person." No sooner had she said those words that a bright light surrounded them and they started flying up. Bunny rolled her eyes.

* * *

Author: wow that was short… sorry bout that… 


	5. Im afraid of Americans

In a second they appeared in Koenma's office.

Raye stumbled and fell. "Whew. Space travel always makes me woozy." she rolled over, realizing the soft, cushiony thing that broke her fall was her older sister "Sorry 'Suna." she said.

"No, mommy I don't wanna get up yet! Hit the penguins! They stole my wallet!" the passed out girl mumbled.

"These are the girls who were gonna beat us up?" scoffed Yusuke. It is at that point he smelled something burning. He felt on his head and realized it was his hair (very flammable cause of the jell) he screamed (like a little girl) and jumped around until Kurama threw a container of water on his head. Kuwabara laughed at this hilarious scene and Yusuke kicked him, but in the act tripped over his own to feet, quickly following his orange-haired friend to the ground.

"These are the boys that were going to beat us up?" asked Bunny mockingly.

"Bacon." agreed a still passed out Setsuna.

Koenma coughed and said. "Please, everyone sit down, would you like anything to drink?" he asked politely. Koenma appeared to be a toddler, complete with a pacifier in his mouth.

"Drinks? Where?" asked a now awake Setsuna.

"She wakes up when there is a alcohol involved but not when she could be in mortal danger? Some bad guy she is!" laughed Yusuke. No sooner had he uttered those words then a knife came flying out of no where, missing his head by half an inch.

'Suna stood up, dusting off her hands and said. "You insult me again and the next time I won't miss." she said.

"Please, no bloodshed in my office." said Koenma.

"And who are you to boss around-" Setsuna turned around and spotted the short underworld ruler. Her eyes widened and she eeped. She ran, ducking behind the chair Bunny was sitting in. "AHHHH! Bunny! get him away!!! Save me!!!!!" Yusuke and Kuwabara laughed, and even Kurama snickered in spite of himself. The only reason Hiei didn't was because he was passed out.

Koenma hopped down from his stool and walked towards Bunny and the cowering girl behind her. Speaking of the cowering one, when she saw the toddler getting closer she pulled out a gun. "Don't come any closer! You do and I'll blow your fucking brains out!"

"If I were you I would do what she says. You see Koenma sir, my sister has this profuse fear of children. I'm afraid if you get too close she might actually hurt you." explained Raye-chan.

"Why is she afraid of kids?" asked Kuwabaka.

"Because," explained Bunny "Once, when we where in a Hell dimension she got tortured by little kids, she's never been the same."

"Oh. In that case." Koenma turned into his teenager form.

"Setsuna, 'Suna-chan? the child is gone." said Bunny.

Setsuna opened her eyes and saw what her sister said was true. She stood up and dusted her self off. "Now that that's over... someone said something about drinks?"

Once everyone (including an awoken Hiei) was seated and Setsuna had a drink in her hand, Koenma said "I am sure you are wondering why I have brought you here." a choruses of "No, not really", "Nopes" and "Not particularly" and even one "I need to go potty" answered him. Koenma frowned. "Well I'll tell you anyway. I was called upon yesterday by a friend of mine-"

"Who?" asked Bunny.

Koenma looked a little embarrassed for a moment and said "Your father."

"Aw bloody hell." cursed Setsuna while her other sisters looked embarrassed.

Taking advantage of the silence Koenma continued "He informed me that the three girls here have been doing a few... questionable things including-"

"Oh like he's one to talk. We weren't the one who released hell, he did." said Bunny.

Koenma glared and said "INCLUDING bank robbery and plotting to destroy several worlds. He said that maybe if I would give you a job you might straighten up and become if not good, law-abiding citizens then at least a little less like villains."

"He always did say villanism was so trite, always the same, taking over worlds, destroying them." sighed Raye.

"That is why," Koenma concluded "I have decided to have you team up with the Urimeshi team and become spirit detectives."

* * *

Author: oooh another short one… incase you were wondering Bunny got tortured by leather miniskirts, and Raye got tortured with bad music in the Hell dimension… so basically they are all fucked up.

Bunny: oh you're one to talk.


	6. Suspension without Suspence

Author: Ha! This is my sixth chapter. Anyway I need your help. I need to find a name here is a list. Pick your Fav. Elita, Oriel, Catalina. Desi, Mia, Etsu, Mai, Ma'ax, Marieko, Snow, Terra, and Destiny. Anyway. That is all. You may go back to your story.

* * *

"WHAT??!" Yusuke jumped out of his seat. "Listen squirt! We don't need help from a bunch of psycho chicks!"

"Yusuke, calm down before you get blood splattered on my new rug." Koenma said, noticing the look of blood-thirstiness on the faces of the three girls. "Besides. I said they could work here but not for how long. We are going to do a...trial run. They are going to go with you for your next few missions. Depending on how they do, they will work here full time or they might not."

Setsuna who had had her eyes closed and was nodding throughout the speech said. "Okay, how much do we get paid?"

Everyone except the sisters did an anime fall. "W...well" Koenma stuttered.

"You were going to pay us weren't you?" asked Bunny.

"Well... its just a trial run. If you make it we will talk then about pay."

"Nope." Suna said. "We won't do it."

"Too late." Said Koenma. "Your father signed your contract and its been witnessed." Koenma held out a piece of paper with three signatures. One was Koenma's, one was 'Gregory William Hellsing' and the last with the words 'witnessed' by it was 'Tempest Storm Hellsing'

"TEMPEST!!" The three sisters yelled

"Tempest, you traitor get your ass down here NOW!" Yelled Setsuna

"Yeah! You friggin Daddy's girl!" Bunny added.

A flash of light appeared and with it a girl that was a little shorter than Raye (who is taller than Bunny by at least a foot) She had fire red and yellow hair with bright green eyes. She had a pink shirt on with 'guns don't kill people I do' written in black. Her jeans had black spikes up them and she had black boots on. "Whazzup?" she asked smacking her gum.

"Tempest, you idiot why'd you have to sign the stupid contract?!!" yelled Raye.

"Hey," she said putting her hands up. "You guys needed something to do. You just

got out of your last job and you were coming to this dimension anyway. I thought it would be fun. You need a life." explained the sister.

"Oh WE needed the life? Most of the time you're just an idea! At least we are corporeal all... most of the time." Setsuna yelled.

By this time the Urimeshi team was beyond confused. Tempest saw this and said. "Well, aren't you gonna introduce me to your new coworkers?"

Raye simmered but said. "This is Yusuke, Kurama, Hiei and... um I'm sorry I forgot your name." she said to Kuwabara. Not giving him time to answer she continued. "And he's Koenma but you knew him. And everyone, this is my younger sister Tempest."

"Younger?" asked Kurama.

"Well in human years. She ages differently and looks 16, but she's only 361 years old."

Kurama nodded and continued "What did you mean about her not being corporeal all the time?"

"What's corporeal mean?" asked Kuwabara.

"It means solid." explained Kurama before looking back to Raye.

"She's a muse. She goes into people's heads and she isn't solid-y anymore." explained Raye-chan.

"Oh."

"Yeah." said Tempest, sitting down in Bunny's old chair. "I am responsible for many of the best movies." then she thought for a second. "Except Titanic. Someone had to sell their soul to Satin for that load of garbage."

"Oh! I sunk the Titanic!" put in Raye. Everyone looked at her for a second.

"So? Big deal. It's just a boat. I sunk Atlantis." bragged Setsuna. Everyone jerked their heads to look at her.

"But islands sink all the time! That was the unsinkable ship!" argued Raye.

"Humanity was asking for it by saying that! It's in The Rules! It would have happened anyway. Atlantis was advanced. They could have been able to stop it." Setsuna quipped.

"Nu-uh it was prophesized..." continued Raye.

The voices of the sibling argument faded into the background while Tempest said. "Anyway. I think it will do good if my sisters had something to do."

"That's not your decision. There is something called free will." said Bunny coldly.

"Well, it's already done, 'sides if I hadn't signed dad woulda found another person to sign."

"That's not the point! We should have a chance do decide for ourselves!" yelled Bunny

"SILENCE!!" A door opened in the air and a man stepped out. He had purple hair that was hung down into his eyes. Those eyes were covered by a bright green silk band. He was wearing a green loose silk shirt and matching pants. He wasn't particularly tall but his presence oozed control and power.

His command had stopped everything. Bunny and Tempest still faced each other and Setsuna had frozen stretching Raye's cheeks out and Raye was frozen Holding Suna's head back at an odd angle. "Daddy?"

* * *

Author: Wasn't that touching.

Setsuna: just a regular day in the life of the Hellsing sisters.

Author: yeah. Anyway I have a new fic out called 'Someday is Made for Dreamers.' It's based loosely on the movie Dogma. Not as much based as it has some of the concepts. It would be nice if you could go read it.

Cherry: Beg why dontcha

Author: Shuddup

Willow: this conversation took place in the past, and this is Author-chan's revision note that she asked me to do, firstly no one ever gave her any idea's for her name, secondly "Someday is Made for Dreamers" now has a sequel, "Someway is Made for Love" Now for a note…

1) The Rules is a book that holds all the rules that must be abided when telling a story. It exists in this realm, the penalty of breaking a rule is that something… unfortunate will happen to your stories legacy (like pour example, the penalty the fates chose for JK Rowling making Harry right about Malfoy and Snape, as well as a few other… choice decisions… is that the actress who played Hermione decided not to play in any other movies after the Order of the Phoenix… and the Actor who played Harry may or may not be playing in the last movie.)

2) Author asks that you do not take the example in offence… please don't kill her for having a few things against Harry Potter, she still reads the books… she just disagrees with some things that Ms. Rowling did.


	7. Credit in the Straight world

Author: The seventh chapter. I can't believe it. Just so you know this chapter was especially aggravating cause half of it got deleted… so you better appreciate it!!

* * *

"Daddy?" asked all of the girls. At the same time the purple haired man stepped further in the room.

He raised an eyebrow. "None other." he said smoothly. "Now, everyone. No reason to remain standing on my account. Please sit." Everyone who was standing did as he said, the ones who were already sitting would have sat down again if they could.

The man known as Gregory floated (that's the only word for it) to Koenma's desk and half leaned-half sat against/on it. He smiled at everyone and looked at each of them, which is an extraordinary feet for being blind. "I understand there is a dispute about whether are not my three trouble makers will cooperate with my plan for them to work here."

"It is not so much our not wanting to work here father," explained Bunny "It's just we were given no choice."

"Yeah and without pay?" added Setsuna.

Gregory sighted theatrically. "It will be good for you. Humor your poor father and work here for a term. It will do you no harm." he smiled a smile that would make anyone want to do his will.

"I have a question." stated Raye. "Hell has nothing to do with this set of heart does it?"

Her father laughed. "Hell is as much of this as Heaven, darling."

"Yes." said Bunny testily. "But he didn't tell you to do this did he?"

"Pff like your life concerns me mortal." said a voice.

"If you want to continue getting cable it does." muttered Bunny. Hell sighed then made no other comment.

"That was hell?" asked Kurama.

"Yes Kitsune. It was." said Gregory.

"Hell lives in our basement." explained Suna.

"Oh."

A snorting noise brought everyone from there minds. They all looked to the source of the noise. They saw Hiei doubled over laughing. "What the hell is with you people?" He asked before straightening up and regaining control over the laughing organism.

Everyone looked stunned for a second and then started laughing. Nerves had been sprung way too tight.

After that the girls' father got up and went to the door. "I just have a few words to say before I depart. Tempest." the green eyed girl got up and went to her father's side. "Girls. You will work here for as long as Koenma lets you. Be good. Try not to kill your new coworkers. And have fun." He smiled before stepping through the door and disappearing.

It was silent for a while. "So it looks like we will be working here from now on." Bunny said.

* * *

Author: yes, Hell lives in their basement, and yes he is a friend of their father's. Why does hell live in the basement you may ask? He's their heater. So yes, once Hell was set loose by Gregory, the result being Barney… and Teletubies… (shiver) When hell was imprisoned again they made Gregory promise never to set him loose again. So now he just goes down there and talks to Hell. Hell's actually pretty cool. He knows all the best jokes.

Hell: You know what? Cobblestone streets rock bwahahahahaha!

Author: second thought… maybe he's not that funny…


	8. State of Mind

The girls were back at their apartment. "I want ice-cream." said Bunny.

"Yeah and I want Booze, but can I have that? NOOOOO." Setsuna said sarcastically. She huffed and stood up. "I'm gonna go out and smoke." she announced.

Outside it was already dark but Setsuna wasn't afraid. She had spent 200 years living in a house with Hell in the basement. She flicked out her lighter but it wouldn't light. "Stupid piece of crap." A hand came out of the dark with a lighter flame dancing on it. "Thanks. You're a lifesaver." she said before lighting her cigg. Then she laughed. "Well I guess you're technically a killer." she looked at her cigarette. "Oh well. You have to die sometime."

Her companion laughed. "Been there. Done that."

"Yeah." Setsuna said. "I met death once. Nice chick. Kinda eccentric though."

"You've met death? She doesn't have blue hair does she?" the man beside her asked.

"What? No. Black hair. Like her brother Dream… the first one anyway, the current dream has white hair." She sighed

A car light passed over them and they looked at each other as familiarity dawned. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

Back in the apartment the three girls sat with the Urimeshi team standing. Bunny and Raye still hadn't quite gotten over the scene of Setsuna dragging Yusuke through the door by his ear.

"Is this someone's idea of a joke?! We are living right beside them! We have to work with them! And they already tried to kill us." Setsuna was ranting if you haven't already noticed.

Kurama coughed. "To be perfectly fair you tried to kill us too."

"So? You guys were sent after us BY OUR OWN FATHER!!!" Nothing could stop Setsuna from her rants.

Bunny hit her sister in the head "Shut up. You're giving me a head ache." Except that.

Setsuna glared and rubbed the back of her head. "Fine. Still, I don't trust them."

"Well your not exactly trustworthy yourself." Said Yusuke.

"Why you!!" a yelling match ensued between the two who just a few minuets ago had been talking like old friends.

Bunny rubbed her temples. "SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I CUT YOU INTO LITTLE PIECES AND FEED YOU TO THE HOUNDS OF HELL!!" she yelled. Nothing made a sound in a two hundred mile radius. "Thank you, was that so hard?" she asked to no one in particular. "Here's the deal. We have to work with them. We can't move and I don't think they are willing to."

"Well that's not really a factor is it?" said Setsuna, cracking her knuckles and looking menacingly at the boys.

"Setsuna." said Raye warningly.

"Yeah, Yeah. Don't kill the coworkers. I'm not talking killing. Just maiming. Pweeese?" Setsuna made puppy dog eyes

"No" said her younger sister.

"Fine." said the older girl crossing her arms and pouting.

"Yes. Well we do have a problem." said Bunny looking concerned and hesitant.

"What?" growled Setsuna.

"This came in the mail." Bunny held out a letter. "It's an acceptance form for our enrollment of a High School." she cringed.

"So?" said Setsuna.

"Well. It's their High School." She said indicating the boys.

"NO FRIGGIN WAY!!!"

* * *

Author: okay so some notes…

1) The Death that Setsuna mentions is from Neil Gaiman's Sandman… REALLY good comic.

2) We used to always tell people we'd cut them up and feed them to the hounds of hell… I think Raye came up with that one but I don't remember…

3) You'd think that creatures that were over five hundred years old wouldn't NEED to go to school. Well, they look around seventeen or eighteen so they have learned that they usually have to go to school. Poor them


	9. Crash

"NO FRIGGIN WAY!!!" Setsuna fell to the ground. "Shit, I hate it when that happens." The Urimeshi team raised their eyebrows.

"Safety mechanism." Raye explained. "Whenever we are about to destroy something it happens. She won't be able to walk until she calms down."

Setsuna sighed. "Stupid parents and their controllingness, why does it always happen to me? "

Bunny just looked at her. "Cause you're the one in the Author's head."

"Oh yeah." Setsuna smiled. She cautiously stood up. "Well I've decided I'm gonna go to the first pub I see and get stinking drunk. Anyone wanna come with me?"

"I will." said Yusuke.

"Anyone besides him?? Please?"

"I will do anything you ask of me pretty lady!!" said Kuwabara coming forward.

"Second thought I think Yusuke's the lesser of two evils. Come on buddy." she grabbed Yusuke and practically dragged him out.

"Now that THAT'S over with." sighed Bunny. She turned on the TV and sat down. "Anybody who feels like watching Adult Swim can. Everyone else get out of my house!" Everyone sat down to enjoy late night television.

"Wakey wakey!! School's starting in 5 minuets!!" Everyone jerked awake to see the TV still on. They had fallen asleep. Setsuna was standing in front of them in a school uniform. The skirt was navy blue, while the shirt was one of the shorter kinds with a navy collar. She had a blue tie on. She had white socks. Her blue and silver hair was cascading around her still wet from her shower. She had a silver hoop in one ear and two crystal studs in the other one. She was smiling cheerily.

"When did you get home?" murmured Bunny.

"No idea. I woke up here with that doofus-" she pointed to a sleeping Yusuke "passed out beside me. Oh and I also had this." she lifted her shirt to reveal a belly piercing. "Don't know when that happened but-"

"My achin' head!" complained Yusuke.

Kurama looked confused. "Why don't you have a hangover?" he asked Suna.

"I'm a morning person." she explained. "The hangover wont hit till noon." which made no since but this is my story so there.

Then Kurama remembered something. "Did you say school starts in 5 minuets?"

Setsuna smiled "It's 4 minuets now."

"OH SHIT!" Everybody was in a scramble to get ready for school. Yusuke had been rudely awaken by people stepping on him. Finally everyone was ready.

"Uh, Suna?"

"Yeah, Bunny?"

"Where's Ai?"

Setsuna thought for a second and said "Dunno."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW?" Bunny yelled.

"DON'T YELL!!" screamed Yusuke who was trying to nurse his hangover head.

"Uh, I think I know." said Raye pointing to the TV currently tuned to News.

"-and the authorities found this green voltswagon beetle crashed into the Tokyo Tower early this morning. It held a significant amount of sake bottles and an assortment of what appears to be ancient gold and silver currency from various continents. Nothing currently is known about the owner of the automobile but it is too soon to tell..."

Bunny switched of the television, her body vibrating with anger. "You crashed the car with ALL OF OUR MONEY IN IT?!!"

"Sorry?" said Suna

"SORRY WONT CUT IT!! NOW WE DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY FOR RENT!! WE DON'T HAVE A CAR!! AND MOST IMPORTANTLY: **NO. SWEET. SNOW.**" she started crying. Hiei so caught up in the phrase 'no sweet snow' teared up a bit as well.

Kurama who was impatient to get to school (with his impeccable record who wouldn't be) said "You can ride with us, well pay for your rooms, you do cheep labor for us and we will buy you stuff."

Yusuke said, "What!! Help them? Are you crazy?"

At the same time Setsuna said, "No way are you gonna be our sugar daddy!"

"Stop arguing and let's go!" Kurama dragged all of them out to the car and off to school.

* * *

Author: Note time!

1) I'm a morning person, therefore my chick with superhuman powers is too. She's special…


	10. Cold hearted snake

Finally everyone got to school. First Kurama got out of the car, still dragging everybody (Don't ask me how he did it I do not know) He was wearing the boys uniform which was also navy blue and looked like every other Japanese boys uniform.

Just to cut it short, everyone was wearing a uniform that looked exactly the same. Bunny was wearing a red flame necklace and had red stud earrings. Raye had two studs in one ear, one skull earring and two more studs in the other ear as well as a few bracelets.

The bell rang just as they were going to their first classes.

The teacher stands and comes around to the front of her desk. She had brown hair that was pulled back in a bun, leaving her face bare of stray hairs. Her eyes were covered by round wire-rimmed glasses. Her nose was pointed and her mouth was just a thin line. She was wearing a navy blue dress skirt and a matching pin stripe long sleeved dress shirt. She wore navy blue pumps, and her only accessories were gold studs in her ears and a gold cross around her neck. Hose completed her severe outfit.

"Everyone settle down." She said, like students listen to their teachers. "We have some exchange students from...Canada?"

The girls exchange glances. "Have we even been to Canada before?" whispered Raye.

"I think once, during the Great Depression." answered Setsuna.

This conversation was going on while the teach was spouting some junk about learning from other peoples culture. "Would you please come up and introduce yourselves?"

Raye and Setsuna dragged Bunny with them to the front of the class. "Hello I am Setsuna, my friends call me 'Suna, or Sets' or Crazy-alcoholic-chick… I'd prefer you to call me Setsuna."

Raye smiled and said "Hi! My name's Raye!" all of the girls awed at her cuteness and some boys did as well. The ones with brains wondered what a kid was doing in their class.

Everyone turned to Bunny expectantly. When she said nothing Setsuna said. "Her name's Bunny."

Some unfortunate soul said "Bunny? What kinda name is that?" Bunny blurred for a second and when everyone blinked to clear their vision they saw the boy who had spoken on the floor. He had crapped his pants and was crying for his mama. Bunny smiled sweetly.

After everyone got settled in their seats the teacher said. "Pop quiz! It is on the Geometry section we have been working on. Oh and girls, you can choose not to take the quiz, since you're new and all." she said to our heroines. Bunny and Raye chose not to but Setsuna insanely decided to take it.

When they were done Suna said loudly enough for the Spirit detectives and her sisters to here, "I know I did miserably. Math is my WORST subject."

The bell rang and they continued onto their boringness. Before they were out the door the teacher said, "If you want to know your test scores early come by after school!" The day continues like every boring day in Hell until lunch.

"Hey Raye. That boy is staring at you." said Bunny. Raye looked behind her to see a boy that was one year behind them. While Raye had her head turned Setsuna looked menacingly at the boy who was making eyes at HER little sister. She flipped out her pocket knife and threatened him with her eyes. The poor boy paled and quickly turned away. "Hm." said Raye turning back to see Setsuna innocently smiling.

Unfortunately for most of the people in the group they had awoken too late to fix their own lunches so they had to fight for their food with the rest of the dogs. Only Hiei, Bunny and Kurama had lunches. Hiei and Bunny because they are scary and fast, Kurama cause fan girls give him stuff anyway. Yusuke and Kuwabara were sadly without fan girls.

Raye had not yet worked her magic charm to get food.

Setsuna, who HAD got up on time had a box lunch full of delicious looking food. "Here Raye. There is MORE than enough for two people to eat." Suna said pushing the box over to sit in-between the two sisters. Kuwabara and Yusuke were salivating and reached towards the food. Their hands were met by a smack with a frying pan that appeared out of nowhere in Setsuna's hands. "BAD DOGS!! No food for you!" the boys whimpered and used the dreaded weapon- puppy dog eyes!! unfortunately for them Setsuna is a cold hearted snake and refused to give them food even though Raye awed.

Unfortunately for Suna the clock struck twelve and the hangover ran down hickory-dickory dock. "OWMOTHERFUCKERPAININTHEFUCKINGHEAD!!" she screamed holding her head. "I'm gonna puke." she stumbled to the trash can and threw her stomach out. When she came out she reached into her pocket and drew out three Advil's and swallowed them dry. "Lucky I was...expecting that." she opened her thermos to pour out an herbal tea.

"For hangovers." explained Raye.

"Where was that when I was sick?!!" demanded Yusuke.

"SHHH!" said Setsuna holding her throbbing head. "I'm not gonna be able to eat. You guys can have my lunch." she said in an attempt to make them stop talking and make the bongo drum in her temples to shut up as well. "I'm gonna sleep. See you after school." she said stumbling of to an abandoned janitors closet to bask in the dark and quiet.

After the day was done Suna came out of hiding and along with Kurama persuaded everyone else to come back to the classroom to get the test scores. Yusuke and Kuwabara got reeealy low scores (around 29s). Hiei did fairly well (82).

"Aw darn. I didn't get as high as I usually get." Setsuna said pouting. Bunny and Raye rolled their eyes.

"What did you get?" asked Kurama politely.

"Oh. a 101." everyone's eyes bugged out. "I know. I usually get nothing below a 110" everyone turned to Kurama who had paled. "What did you get Kurama?" Setsuna asked nicely.

"A... A 100"

* * *

Author: Notes!

1) Something you should know about the girl's time/dimension traveling thing. Although they were in Canada during some time of Great Depression, they could have been there two years ago according to their timeline. It's all very confusing. It's kinda like Doctor Who… only not…

2) One of Bunny's powers is super speed…

3) I know… I know… No one's smarter than Kurama… well you see they have this long standing feud going on… I even wrote a one-shot about it once… it's somewhere… Setsuna is always trying to out do Kurama…DON'T tell her he's smarter… TRUST ME.

4) I have no clue how she got a 101


	11. dirty boys

Author: I realize I haven't said this in a long time but at this point in time I do not own YYH. Although when I become the ruler of the world it will be owned by me, as well as your eternal soul.

Setsuna: she will be the ruler of the world. Tempest said.

Author: yepers. Oh and just so you know what Tempest says is for real, Tempest is in fact my older sister, not a personality of mine.

* * *

Everyone was heading back home. Yusuke was driving because Kurama was in shock. They stalked into the boy's room.

Now let us compare the two rooms of our groups. The girl's apartment had one door to the outside world. On the other side of the world was a medium sized living room with a TV, two couches and an easy chair. There was a kitchenette with a bar separating it from the living room. To the side of the bar was a table and three chairs. All modern appliances were in the kitchen. Off of the living room was a hallway and a door. The door led to a washer and dryer. The hallway led to the girl's three rooms and a bathroom.

The guy's place had basically the exact same build and size as the girl's(Kuwabara slept on the couch) However, whereas the girls room was a little messy the boys was a disaster area. Clothes had begun to spew out of the rooms into the living room. the kitchen had stacks and stacks of dirty dishes. the little part of the area that had a washer and dryer was piled with clothes.

Kurama had long ago given up on trying to keep the place clean. needless to say however his room was spotless. His was the only one.

Setsuna took one look at the room and then smelled Yusuke. "I knew you smelled weird. When was the last time you washed your clothes?" he didn't speak for too long. "Never mind. I DON'T want to know."

Kurama whirred around. "I know how your can earn that ride to and from school. clean this apartment." He ordered looking at Suna.

"No way. I don't need none of your stinkin' money."

Raye came back from their room. "Uh guys. this was on the door." Raye handed Bunny a note.

"Oh shit. Its an eviction notice. apparently the last occupants were a few months behind their rent."

"What happened to the last occupants?" asked Yusuke.

"Nothing." said all of the girls innocently. They refused to say more.

"So it looks like you really need money." said Hiei. He also wanted the house clean.

"Come on 'Suna. You'll just end up doing it anyway. You know your a clean freak."

"Fine." said Setsuna pushing the boys into the world. "Get out of here. You can come back in two hours." she said before closing the door. Setsuna tied her hair up and took some plastic gloves out of her backpack "Let's get to work"

After the two hours were finished Bunny opened the door and the boys walked into their clean home. It shone. The dishes were sparkly and so were the floors. The couches were sparkling and the black and white TV was revealed to be actually a colour one. The clothes were put up and the bed was made so tight you could bounce a quarter off it. "Oh." said Setsuna smugly. "I took the liberty of alphabetizing your CDs."

"They were alphabetized." corrected Kurama politely.

"You call THAT alphabetized?" she laughed.

"We also went shopping." said Raye.

"Yeah. that way you don't need to come over to our place just to pig out." explained Bunny.

"Oh quit bein' a stick in the mud. You KNOW you got that extra boxes of ice-cream for Hiei." teased Raye through their mind link.

Bunny blushed. "Oh and like you didn't buy the roses for Kurama's room" Bunny got her revenge.

"Silly girls." Setsuna rolled her eyes. "My sisters and their little crushes." She sighed nostalgically (which is a nice trick seeing as the conversation was silent)

Both of 'her sisters' turned to her, their eyes flashing. "You don't want us to tell them what we caught you doing in Yusuke's room do you?"

Setsuna suddenly looked smaller. "Sorry mistress." she said.

A loud rumbling sound occurred, distracting them from their conversation. Again the noise originated from the short fire apparition. Instead of laughing however, it was his stomach growling. "I agree." said Yusuke. "You girls make dinner."

"Way ahead of you." Raye said taking out something out of the oven. "It's okay." she said looking at their faces. "I'm a good cook." she lifted the lid and delicious smells of cooked meat and veggies. "We also have hot cheese biscuits and we have some chocolate-chocolate cake and raspberry chocolate ice-cream." it is by this time everyone was drooling.

"Now." said Setsuna. "Before we serve you this yummy meal you give us the money for the apartment.

Kurama dug in his pockets and handed her the money, eyes never leaving the steaming pot of foody-yumness. "Okay." she said, pocketing the money. "Let's eat."

* * *

Author: I realize I made Setsuna into a mega-bitch but its all Edward's fault!!

Setsuna: dude you can't let Eddy-boy ruin our relationship. That's my job.

Author: it's just that he called me a bitch today…

Cherry: where is that ass?? Ill beat 'im for makin' fun of my little body donor.

Author: aw you cant be too hard on him. He is just a guy you know.

Willow: in case you are confused Edward is one of Author-sama's friends.

Marie: Yo! I'm here to house the notes in the revision

1) Still don't own the world yet…

2) I don't even know what happened to the last occupants of their appartment

3) I'm a neat freak… so is Setsuna… she just doesn't let it show a lot.

4) they all have a mind link. They are special

5) We can all cook. I make killer cheese biscuits.


	12. Sleeping dogs

After lunch everyone crashed. They started watching TV and everyone fell asleep. While they were sleeping a little bitty mouse crept out and realized all of the dishes were clean and there wasn't a drop to eat. "My family will starve!" the little creature wailed. But that is another story.

So since everyone went to sleep they could not put the alarm on to wake them up. lucky for them it was Saturday. A car alarm started being...well alarming and Bunny sat straight up yelling "Rabid squirrels die mother fuckers!!" then fell back asleep, her head falling on Hiei's tummy.

Everyone else was awake now, Setsuna was asleep on the kitchen table. Yusuke on the floor where he passed out when Suna kicked him for 'accidentally' touching her boob. Raye had been leaning against Kurama, both sitting on the floor because they were to afraid of Hiei and Bunny's glairs to sit on the only couch.

Yusuke groaned. "My achin' head. Didn't I say that yesterday?"

"Shut up fur ball head." muttered Setsuna before rolling of the table and 'accidentally' landing on him before standing up and kicking both Bunny and Hiei off of what she viewed HER couch, ignoring their death glares.

Both Kurama and Raye got up. "Who wants donuts?"

They all trouped outside to get donuts. It is at that point a battered green volts wagon pulled up in the parking lot with no one driving it. "look it's Ai!" said Raye. She ran up and patted its greenness.

"Hello Raye." said the car.

The boys looked at each other "Stranger things have happened." said Kurama.

"Ai? is the money still there?" asked Setsuna, hoping this would get her out of the way of Bunny's wrath

"No. they took it out and put it in little plastic bags. It took me so long to get out of the police building." explained the car.

"Why do you keep calling it Ai?" asked Yusuke.

Setsuna sighed. "First of all she is a she. Second I wanted to name her Herby but that's a guy so Raye named her Ai. " Suna explained, disappointed that the money had not returned with the car.

"Would it be safe to keep the car? I mean wouldn't the police be looking for it." said Kuwabara

"Oh! Oh! can I do it?" said Setsuna excitedly, raising her hand.

"Sure." said Bunny.

Suna went over to Ai and put her hand on the greenness. The car started to form under Suna's hand. It stretched until it became a van, sort of like the kind hippies drive. It was a medium blue with purple accents. The interior was leopard print, including the steering wheel. on the inside ceiling of the car was a panting of a purple crying fairy. the whole thing was part hippy-part princess and in my eyes the perfect car but in the boys eyes kinda scary.

"YAY!!" said Raye. "Pretty kitty!!"

"Let's get donuts before we cause a scene." said Bunny hopping into the back seats. Setsuna drove. (fasten your seat belts; barf bags are in the pocket beside your seat) Raye sat up front with Yusuke and Kurama sat in the middle and Hiei sat in the very back.

"Donuts!!" but before Suna could put Ai in gear a beam of light hit them and a portal swallowed them up. "Donuts?"

* * *

Author: Notes…

1) squirrels are evil… oh my god… that's the FIRST TIME EVER that I've spelled squirrels right on the first time (party)

2) Ai means love

3) Ai is not only a talking, shape shifting car. She is also a supercomputer. She does all kinds of stuff, she's really cool. I want her… dearly…


	13. Attack of the Penguins

So. People were whisked away to Koenma's place AGAIN. When the light cleared away they were sitting in chairs with the teenage Koenma in front of them "Here is your first mission. It is in dimension 235. There are reports of a forest in which whenever anybody goes in they never come out. There are high readings of demon activity radiating from the place, so we think it is a clan of some sort. Deal with it." He says pushing a button before anybody could say anything they were whisked away again.

"Wow Charley. No special gadgets?" said Suna sarcastically.

"He seemed stranger than usual. Almost nervous." muttered Bunny.

When they landed they landed on a bunch of trees. "Great. We have to go walking through the woods FIRST THING in the morning. Without breakfast. And I'm wearing my good boots!! It's a conspiracy I tell you!! Koenma got captured by the government for testing and that was a drone from the alien clan in league with the government. They want me to be unhappy." muttered Suna.

"Yeah. Just like the world revolves around you." said Bunny.

"It does!!" this bickering continued as they went further into the forest.

"Hey guys this way!" said Raye interrupting the serious debate on whether the cream or the cookie is better in the Oreo. Raye pointed to the left.

"Why would it be that way, the trail is that way." Yusuke said pointing to the right.

Raye glared at him and said. "One- do you REALLY think the trail would lead to the bad guys' hideout? And two- there is a big castle in the next clearing, perfect for a baddies house." she said looking superior.

"Fine. We'll do it YOUR way." he said. Which they did.

They crept into the clearing and saw the bigestmotherfucking castle they had ever seen. It even had a moat! It was made of a grayish white stone and had many windows. Most being stained glass. It had about 14 towers. Suddenly they heard a noise and were seized by... dun-dun-dun PENGUINS!!

Anyway they were grabbed by giant penguins and were being marched to the castle. Of course they struggled but the big penguins were just so big and fluffy nothing worked. When they got to the moat they realized there were smaller penguins playing in the water "Aw. They're so cute!!" squealed Raye, Setsuna and Bunny. Yes, Bunny said cute.

They were marched up the wooden stairs, past rooms that were sorta dusty and looked as if no one had touched them in a few hundred years. They finally reached their destination winded from all the climbing. One of the penguins knocked on the door and a female voice said. "Enter."

They did, and what they saw confused them. This was the only room that looked lived in. It had an air conditioner and central lighting. There were regular wooden walls and carpets. There was a huge window in the back of the room. The view was not one of a forest, but one somewhere in Mexico.

There was a desk in the middle of the room with a girl who was about five foot four standing behind it. She had black hair with red highlights and red eyes with silver speckles. She appeared to be around 17 years old and Hispanic. She had on a red, long, flowy skirt and a white T-shirt. When she stepped away from the desk and towards them they saw she wore big black boots. "It is very rude to trespass on someone else's property...Raye? Oh my God! Bunny! Setsuna! What are you guys doing here?" The boys' jaws dropped.

"Rosa? I shoulda known! You always had a thing for penguins!" said Raye.

The girl appointed as Rosa leaned against her desk. "Yeah. They're perfect for small tasks and they almost soak in the spells to make them this big. Oh gosh. Guys let them go." the penguins did so. Kuwabara, who hadn't gotten the message that Rosa was a friend ran forward to attack but the stepped over and instead of tackling her hit the desk, flipped over, and knocked himself out. "So what brings three of my favorite older sisters to my humble abode?"

"Well. Have you been killing people who come into the forest?" asked Bunny.

"No. I just made it so that they got lost and transported to another dimension. You know how I hate strangers coming on my property." she explained.

"Yeah I figured." her older sister nodded.

"Waaaait. You guys are sisters?" asked Yusuke.

"Yep. Can't you see the family resemblance?" asked Suna.

"If you mean crazy yeah." he answered.

All of the sudden Rosa was in front of him with a deadly looking scythe pointed at his throat, ready to lop his head off. "Don't you EVER insult me or my family. You got that?"

"Yes." Yusuke said softly. When Rosa backed off he could see Setsuna, Raye and Bunny doubled over with laughter. He glared but because he appreciated his head he didn't say anything.

"Well um. Problem. We were sent here to stop you from…disquieting the locals." said Bunny.

"Huh?" asked Rosa confused.

"Dad made us be spirit detectives with these idiots and we were sent here to take care of you. They actually thought you were a demon clan." explained Suna.

"Oh." Rosa said.

A beam of light hit them "What does Koenma want now?"

* * *

Author: NOTES!!

1) Setsuna's paranoid. So am I… I actually will go off on a tangent about my paranoid conspiracies just like Setsuna does…

2) penguins are cool

3) Rosa is one of Raye's characters.


	14. Everybodys fool

Eventually the light cleared from their eyes and they saw they were back in their car. "WHAT THE HECK?"

"Where's Rosa?" Asked Setsuna

"Maybe she was dropped off somewhere else." Kurama mused.

"Why would Koenma do that?" asked Bunny.

"I keep telling you it's not Koenma! He took her to get her memories reprogrammed so she could become a government drone! Poor Rosa!! Wait how do we know we aren't in a paralysis right now? That Koenma hasn't taken us hostage and we're all dreaming all of this. Right now they would be putting aliens into our brains to control our nervous system and be treated as regular humans! It's probably as an alien-human exchange program adapted from the schools of Eastern America!"

Bunny slapped her sister. "Snap out of it. We don't have any time for your paranoid conspiracies!" she snapped.

"Fine." Suna pouted.

"Guys. Do we even have a way to reach Koenma and ask him?" asked Raye.

"No." said Hiei.

Everyone stayed there for a few minuets contemplating their position in the war against authority. "Who's up for donuts?"

After they got donuts it was almost dinner time. I don't really feel like telling you what happened next since it is unimportant. Mostly people got drunk, people got angry, somehow narcotics and jelly beans were involved, so was a trip to Mexico in the back of a chicken wagon (don't ask how since they're in Japan). The team ended up getting back to Japan and sleeping it all off during Sunday.

In the morning of Monday the alarm clock rung. A hand too white to be human snapped out of the pile of bodies to turn on the snooze. "Just another hour. I can make it to school on time." muttered the body connected to the hand.

"Bunny. Stop mumbling. It's not nice to the other sleepers." said another half-out of it voice.

"What time is it?" asked a male voice.

Dark blue eyes peaked out of the human dog-pile. "9:20." Raye said before falling back to sleep.

"That's nice." said the voice, falling back to sleep. "9:20!" They all snapped awake.

When everyone finally reached school, they looked exhausted. They were only half ready, the girls almost bare of jewelry except for the few pieces they slept in. Everybody's clothes were rumpled.

When they got into the classroom the teacher said. "Well, look who finally decided to show up. Come is and say hello to our new transfer student- Rosa."

* * *

Author: man, this was a short chapter… sorry bout that… 


	15. Skipping

"WHAT THE-" Everyone yelled before muffling their immediate desire to curse. All of their class mates stared at them.

"Do you have anything you want to share?" asked the teacher.

"No." everyone replied.

"Good. Now Rosa you may sit by Chad there." The black and red haired girl sat down.

Her sisters just gapped at her for a few until they were forced to pay attention to the teacher.

After class Rosa walked out the door. A pale arm snuck out and grabbed her. She attempted to scream but another hand muffled it. She turned around to see Bunny and the gang. "What the hell are you doing here?" the silver haired shorty asked.

Rosa smiled. "Well Koenma gave me a choice: go to jail or to school and become a spirit detective. I decided school."

Everyone sighed. "So you got a place to stay?" asked Raye.

"Yep. Koenma gave me a mansion!"

"NO FRIGGIN WAY!" Setsuna screamed. "No fair! we live in an apartment and you get a mansion? Let us come live with you PLEASE!" she begged.

"Sure. what are sisters for?" Rosa said.

"YAY! we get a house!"

After the initial partying they went to class. Except Yusuke and Setsuna, each making up an excuse to leave.

Bunny rolled her eyes. "Setsuna's started skipping school again."

"So is Yusuke." said Kuwabara. "He always skips classes."

"So does Setsuna. And yet she always seems to make all A's." said Raye.

We are going follow Yusuke and Setsuna now. And NO they are not going away to neck! Get your minds out of the gutters people!

Soo. Both of the teenage delinquents go to the roof and hang out. Its a little cloudy so it was perfect outside weather

Setsuna lights a cigg and sighs. "Pretty clouds." she comments before sitting down and leaning against the wall. Yusuke just lit his cigarette and said nothing. A flask of alcoholic goodness appeared in Sets' hands. She swallowed some and offered the rest to Yusuke. He took a swallow.

"Soo. come here often?" She asked, attempting conversation.

"I just got out of prison." Yusuke said laughing.

Setsuna punched him friendly. "Wow now that pick-up line is waay better than mine." she said giggling at the random stupidness. "You know what I realized? I really don't know you people well. All I know is you're all stupid and work for Koenma."

"I'm not thaat stupid."

Setsuna nodded. "Whatever you say. So. You like to drink and smoke. Anything else I should know?" she asked.

"I'm good in bed." he said, faking seriousness.

"Ah. so you're a pervert too. shoulda known." Sets said shaking her head.

"What about you? All I know is your some kind of demon with many siblings who likes to hit me." he said.

"Well," Setsuna said, turning away from him. "You don't need to know anything else."

"Aw come on! I told you something!"

"Fine." Setsuna said leaning in closer. "But this is a secret so I'm gonna whisper it." she said. She put her lips next to his ear and whispered. "I'm good in bed too." He shivered and turned around. She was gone and the door to the roof was open.

At lunch everyone was reunited by food!

"So Yusuke. What did you do when you skipped class?" asked Kuwabara.

Yusuke blushed slightly and hit Kuwabara in the head "None of your business!"

Setsuna smiled secretly to herself. Raye looked back and forth between the two strange acting drunks.

"Ohhhh." she started humming a song.

"What are you humming?" asked Kurama.

"Oh. just a little song I remembered. Do you wanna hear it?" Kurama nodded. "It goes like this. Setsuna and Yusuke sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes luuuuv and then comes marriage then comes Yusuke with a baby carriage! That's not all That's not all! Here comes baby drinking alcohol!" she sang.

Setsuna pounced on her little sister, beginning to strangle her. Now, usually she's not so apposed to that little didy but it was directed at her and she had yet to consume enough alcohol today, so there you go. "Raye you weirdo!" she said, attempting to strangle the hell out of her little sister.

Rosa pulled her off. "Bad Setsuna! Bad!" she said.

All of the sudden part of the school exploded. People screamed and started pouring out of the room. Soon the only ones left in the room were the spirit detectives.

Five figures came out of the dust that used to be school. One was tall with black-green hair going to his shoulders. He had a muscled body, and pale blue eyes. He had armor over jeans and a t-shirt. In his hands was a giant sword.

Another was a girl with long silver hair done in a braid down her back. Her eyes were a cold husky blue. She was in a silver kimono and had bow and arrows strapped on her back as well as a slender sword.

Two more were twins, both had gray spiked hair and were wearing identical blue paints, no shirt. The were muscled, and medium height. There eyes were bright green.

The last one was another girl with bright pink hair cut short. Her eyes were brown. She had on black pants and tank top. She had a sword with a silver chain attached to it.

They looked at the eight remaining people in the cafeteria. The tall one with the big sword smirked and said "Hello Rabbit. I told you I'd find you."

Bunny hissed "Kane!"

* * *

Author: NOTTTTES

1) Yeah, I know… flirting… it's yeah…

2) WOO VIOLENCE!!!


	16. Bunny's Karasu

The five strangers stood in front of our heroes. "You don't seem glad to see me." pointed out the obvious leader named Kane.

"Naw. Now why would that be?" asked Bunny sarcastically. "Seeing as you tried to kill me a few times, and almost succeeded in killing my family. No wonder I hate your guts." she glared.

"What?" asked Kurama.

"Her version of Karasu." explained Setsuna.

Kane laughed. "Aw you make me seem so bad. How nice." he laughed some more.

"Gosh, you never would that good of an actor...Ringo." taunted Bunny.

"OHHHH." said Raye and Setsuna

"Kitten whipped." when Setsuna got weird stairs she said. "Sorry. momentary sanity...aaand I'm back."

'Kane' was angry now. "Fine Rabbit. I know when to stop playing. Time to fight." he readied his 'big sword' Yes, he is overcompensating for something.

Bunny smiled. "If that is how you want it." Bunny leaped, making a strike at her nemesis with the strange demented crush on her. He blocked her.

Everyone rushed to help but were blocked by the super villain team. The silver one said. "You are not to intrude in this fight."

"Oh like we are soo gonna listen to you." said Setsuna. She smiles evilly.

"As you wish, I am Gin. You will die now." and she leaps onto the blue haired alcoholic.

Raye turns to the girl with pink hair and says "Hello Seiko-chan. I guess we're sposed to fight." before she drew a wicked looking scythe.

"I suppose Sister-sama." she said before launching into battle.

The twins turned to the boys. The one on the left said. "We are to fight as well. I am Yoshi and this is Tomo." They said before throwing power at the gang.

* * *

Author: man. This is Uber short. Sorry bout that.

1) Ringo: Apple

2) Kane: Warrior

3) Gin: Silver

4) Seiko: Force, Truth

5) Yoshi: Best

6) Tomo: Twin

7) Seiko isn't actually a sister, She and Raye know each other and Seiko calls her sister.

8) I'm using the whole "Karasu isnt just a crazy homopsydal mofo, but he also wants to have hot gay sex with Kurama" shtick. I always thougth it was amusing.


	17. Missed me now you gotta kiss me

Gin and Setsuna were deep in a sword fight. Both are pretty good, but Gin was better. She got a hit in, slicing Setsuna's shoulder. She hissed. "Crap. That's my only school shirt!"

Gin didn't really care. She brought her sword down, which was blocked by a frying pan, Setsuna's silvery sword forgotten. Suna grinned and threw her weight at the girl. The sword groaned and Gin bounced backwards.

Raye was wielding her scythe with deadly grace, Seiko had the chain around one wrist and her sword in the other, currently blocking Raye's reaper. She suddenly turned, wrapping the chain around the edge of Raye's weapon. She pulled, making the scythe turn in Raye's hand. This would have disarmed the younger girl if she hadn't turned at the same time. Metal screeched as both girls drew back momentarily.

The boys were in a fight of power with the twins. The baddies were throwing blue power at the guys who were dodging and blocking ferociously. Hiei would have stabbed both boys by now if there hadn't been a sort of force field around them. Nothing physical could get through. They had to rely on power. The spiky haired demon was hesitant to use his dragon because it would probably destroy the rest of the building, burring them alive. However, he wasn't very patient soo...lets just hope someone brought a shovel.

Bunny was in a sword fight with Kane. He had backed her up into a corner. Even thought Bunny was a way better fighter than he, he was bigger and stronger. He scored a hit in her side. She backed up and ran at him, digging her sword into his arm. She attempted to pull it out but the tip got stuck in his armor. She finally got the sword out but she fell back. She would have been dead if it weren't that her sword had created a large gash in her opponent's side.

She was able to shakily stand up. She put a hand to her side. It came back with blood. "You're going to pay for that!" she growled.

Raye noticed her sister's wound. She would have gone to help if the pink haired villain hadn't chosen that moment to wrap her chain around Raye's neck. The little Hellsing brought her hands to her neck attempting to pry off the thing strangling her.

Setsuna jumped back from her attack on the silver girl. Gin got another sword stroke at Suna's wrist. Her frying pan started to drop. In a last-ditch effort she threw the appliance at the girl. It hit her in the face, cracking her skull. Suna collapsed, breathing hard and holding her wrist. "Crap." she muttered before getting up and starting to limp to her little sister.

The boys finally broke the barrier and streamed in. Kuwabara cut down the twin called Yoshi. "NOOOOO!" said Tomo. "You killed him!" he launched himself at Kuwabara. Yusuke's spirit gun blasted through Tomo, saving Kuwabara in the nick of time.

Setsuna got behind Seiko as she was whispering. "I am sorry to kill you Raye-chan. Do not hold it against me." Setsuna brought up her sword and cut the woman in two. Seiko's eyes widened and she collapsed, blood spurting in an arc.

Suna grabbed her sister, following her to the ground. She held Raye as she regained the ability to breath. "It's okay Raye." she muttered. It is at that point she sees Bunny fighting with blood pouring out of her side.

Kane brought his sword down again. Bunny tried to duck but she slipped on her own blood. "BUNNY!!"

* * *

Author: Notes

1) As usual, I really wish I could give the baddies a bigger part. Their histories are so interesting… and the dynamic is awesome… someday I'll have to write stories for my villains.


	18. Wizard of Oz and Stupid People

Author: hello darling readers! its almost my Birthday! How old will i be turning you ask? hmm lets see FIVE MILLION! naw more like three and twenty black birds baked into a pie. Excuse my delirium. My age is unimportant what is important is what happens to Bunny.

Kane brought his sword down again. Bunny tried to duck but she slipped on her own blood. "BUNNY!!"

At the last moment Bunny held up her sword, blocking her own death. Kane's eyes widened as he smiled. "You'll never give up will you?"

Bunny smiled also. "You will die before I do." She pushed back his sword and pierced his heart with her sword. At the same time a blade snaked into her opponents head. When the body dropped, the hilt of her sword sticking out of the chest, she saw who had helped her kill her long time rival. It was none other than Hiei. He just looked at her as he proceeded to clean the blood off of his sword.

Setsuna came running to her eldest sister, touching the wound delicately. Bunny hissed in pain. "You'll be alright Bunny. Just relax." Suna muttered. She looked at her sister, who was beginning to get fuzzy at the edges.

"Why are you going away?" asked Bunny sleepily.

"I'm not. Your gonna faint now." her sister replied going dark.

"I never faint." was Bunny's last words as she drifted away to dream land.

Bunny awoke with a start to see bandaging around her side. She was wearing a black long-sleeved shirt with "tragedy is cutting my finger, comedy is when a man falls into a open manhole and dies" printed on it. Black jeans went down her legs. She had no jewelry and no adornment accept for her necklace and bandana. She groaned as she put her head back to the pillow. "Stupid Stupid people."

"You better not be talking to me." said a Setsuna now standing in her view. She had a bandage on her wrist and around her shoulder. Her hair was pulled back in a braid on the top of her head. A green tank-top that tied behind her neck clung to her torso as blue plaid short-shorts barely covered her. Long legs lead to black ankle boots with spiked heals. Beads covered her wrists, almost to her elbows. Silver studs decorated her ears.

"No. You where the one who healed me." Bunny said drowsily.

"Actually no." Setsuna grimaced. "Kurama did. I had to concentrate on my own wounds." she said mimicking Kurama. "Stupid fox. If dad hadn't told me not to I would kill him." she muttered sitting on the bed.

"OUCH! What was that for?" she asked a bandaged Raye who had hit her in the head.

"For bein' mean to nice people." she explained, also settling on Bunny-chan's bed. She had her arm in a sling and some chain marks around her neck. She was wearing a blue plaid skirt and a purple t-shirt with a skull on it. Her shoes were knee-high platforms with chains around the ankles. Chains decorated her hips just as earrings did her ears and rings her fingers. Her hair was loose around her shoulders.

"Speaking of the boys, where are the morons?" asked Sets.

"Hey! Is that anyway to talk to the people who pay your rent?" said Yusuke testily. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, a spiked belt around his hips. The rest of the boys not far behind. Kurama was wearing dress slacks and a green button-up shirt. Hiei was wearing black pants and a black tank-top, his many belts secure around is waist. Kuwabara was wearing a shirt with the neck and arms torn off over jeans.

"It is if they are half as annoying as you are." glared 'Suna. Yusuke stuck his tongue out, Setsuna followed suit.

"Both of you stop it." said Bunny. Everyone was gathered around her at this point. She glared.

"Don't you people have anything better to do? I feel like friggin Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. I'm not crazy and if you give me that look you won't live long enough to end puberty!"

'Suna sighed. "I think she's well enough. Let's go before she decides to set us of fire for the heck of it."

They started filing out until only Hiei was left. As he turned to go Bunny said "Thank you. I mean for helping me. Even though I had it under control at least you cut the bastard's head off."

Hiei 'hmphed' and walked out the room. Bunny smiled behind his back.

* * *

Setsuna: i have a question! see Bunny-chan and i have been having an argument.

Author: pff more like a battle of stupidity.

Setsuna: whatever puny mortal. Anyway. who do you like better? ME or BUNNY? answer me!

Bunny: they like me cause im nicer

Setsuna: WHAT-EVER. I don't burn people on sight! I give them alcohol.

Bunny: oh yeah? well I give them cookies

Setsuna: well I have milk AND cookies!

Author: please. end the argument and vote!

Willow: again, I am the herald of the Notes

1) yeah… Bunny smiled… at Hiei… Hiei was nice and helped Bunny kill the crazy person. You betcha.


	19. Where did Rosa go?

"Where the hell is Rosa?" Setsuna realized they hadn't seen their fourth sister in the fight.

Afore mentioned sister walked through the room licking on a chocolate ice-cream cone, freezing when her name was mentioned. She was wearing a long red skirt with slits up to mid thigh, those slits revealing black boots with three inch heal. A black t-shirt with "I'm not afraid of dying, but I'm scared as hell of death" printed on it adorned her upper body. Gold jewelry claimed her wrists.

"Hiya Rosa where you been?" Raye asked.

"Why didn't you help us fight off the crazy people?!" interrupted a battered Bunny.

"Uh…cause I was called away on a mission. And look who I found!" The black and red haired Hellsing reached into thin air and pulled out a girl. A girl who appeared to be seventeen and who had brown hair and eyes. She was quite short, being only five foot four, and was wearing flip-flops, cargo pants and a pink long sleeve shirt. In her hands was a bag of marshmallows that she was happily munching on.

"Mimi!" the three girls said incredulously.

"I'm so confused!" wailed Yusuke and Kuwabara

"Wait… uh how did she appear there? That's not physically possible." puzzled Kurama

"Actually all of us have a small talent for time distortion. That and Rosa's magic made it possible for her to create a small tear in the fabric of space and reach me. It also helps that we have the same DNA. If you couldn't tell I'm their sister." the intelligent chick stated.

Everyone was silent until Yusuke finally said "How many sisters do you have?"

All sisters were quiet. Then Setsuna said "um seventeen sisters including me." Mr. Jaws meet Mr. Floor. "Annndd… ten brothers." Anime fall time!

"Where your parents rabbits or something?" asked Hiei.

"Nah, just weird people who like sex. But hey, they can't be that bad since they birthed me." said Setsuna

People almost died attempting to keep their laughter from showing. Poor Setsy. She's not that bad. She's just drawn that way.

"So Mimi. What are you doing here?" asked Raye

"Well I was working for a villain in that one anime world…uh the YugiOh! one. So Rosa went there on Koenma's orders, guy's in jail and I am now a Spirit Detective."

"Awesome." her sisters said

"Well I guess I'll make dinner for everyone-" Setsuna said before tripping over a pile of clothes and falling on her face "THAT'S IT!! I officially hate this apartment. Rosa!! Where is that mansion you promised us?"

* * *

Author: NOOOOOTES

1) Mimi is another of Raye's characters.


	20. The Raven

The girls' new home was located in the middle of the wilderness at least ten miles away from any sort of civilization. In the back of the house was a two acre expanse of cleared away ground that was being used as a training yard. Off of the yard was a porch that had two doors. One lead to the rest of the house, the other lead to a room full of weapons from every place and time.

The actual mansion was three stories tall. The first floor included a huge living room. It featured a gigantomous entertainment system including big screen TV, a giant boom box and speakers the size of a galaxy. Also on the bottom floor was a kitchen with two refrigerators, a dining room with Japanese style table, and a bathroom.

On the second floor were bedrooms. On the third floor was a giant loft like space set up as a studio. On one side was a stage and closet with tons of instruments. On the other side was an art studio. In the middle was free space to dance. The ceiling had a complete lighting system and disco ball. On the back wall was a bar complete with everything from vodka to sake. You could either take the stairs or a glass elevator.

"Well, not as big as mom's house, but I guess it will do." said Setsuna, setting down her bags on the hallway floor. They had brought the boys along so they were standing behind her. The yuppies (Kuwabara and Yusuke) were open mouthed at the expanse. The other remaining spirit squad didn't bat an eyelash.

"Where are our rooms Rosa?" asked Raye.

"The ones that have your doors. There's a CP to your old rooms hooked up to this house."

"A CP?" asked Kurama

"Continuum Portal." explained Bunny who was off to find her room. That was all the poor guys got as an explanation.

"To cut back on rent you guys wanna move in with us?" asked Mimi

"No!" yelled Bunny and Setsuna.

"Do you know how annoying they would be?" asked Setsuna.

"I'll kill them." said Bunny.

"Stop being so rude." chastised their sister. "You're gonna need to see them because you guys work together. You might as well be in one place incase of emergences." The girls glared but said nothing more.

"Now then." said Mimi, turning towards the boys. "You guys can have the first rooms on the right. Dinner will be ready at six."

Everyone went to their respective rooms to unpack. (The boys' stuff was portaled there by Rosa.) At six everyone came down to eat. Just as everyone was in the hallway a gong came out of thin air and beet itself against Yusuke's head.

"What the Hell?!" he asked, rubbing his poor noggin.

"Someone's at the door." said Rosa. She crossed to the big oak door and pulled it open.

Standing their was a fifteen year old girl. She was of medium height, being five seven. She was wearing black leather pants that were a bit loose around motorcycle boots. She had a plain white t-shirt under a leather jacket. She was slightly tan and had dark blue hair that was almost black. Her eyes were a drowning greenish black. She held a gray motorcycle helmet with a white starburst on it.

"Christar!" yelled Raye before jumping on the stranger.

The girl's face turned to a smile a second before hugging her back. "Jeeze Raye-chan, you don't have to attack me." She pulled back from her sister and caught sight of the boys. "Hello" she said simply before sobering up.

"Uh guys," said Rosa "This is our sister Christar."

* * *

Author: nottttes

1) Again, there is an allusion towards this family's ability to manipulate time and space. Let me explain the CP. Their house is located in a dimension by itself. This dimension was made by their father and mother by combining different bits of dimension, like a patchwork quilt. The girls have the ability to call their rooms from their house at any given point in time (or space), through the power of CPs. In this house there are CPs That lead to their rooms in their parents house. They cannot go to the rest of the house, only their rooms. Comprende?

2) Christar is actually my character! She's awesome.


	21. Under the Sea

Everyone was sitting around the table with some sort of drink in their hands. Setsuna, Rosa, Mimi and Kurama drank tea. Christar, Bunny, Raye, Yusuke, Kuwabara and Hiei drank coffee. The silence was defining.

"So. What are you doing here Chris?" asked Rosa.

The teenage girl looked up and said "I was asked to come and work for Koenma."

"Sort of out of your job description, isn't it?" commented Setsuna. To that Chris only shrugged.

"What do you do for a living?" asked Kurama.

Chris looked at him but said nothing. "She's an assassin." said Raye. When her older sister glared at her she said "I'm guessing you're not here for a social meeting, you probably are looking for some place to stay. If that is true they live here as well. They need to know what they are dealing with. It's just polite."

Christar sighed but nodded.

"Good. Now that that's over-" before Mimi could say another word a light enveloped them. When it cleared they were in Koenma's office.

"What do you want pacifier breath?" said Yusuke and Setsuna simultaneously. They glared at each other then turned to glare at the teenager freak with a pacifier in his mouth.

"You are going to go on another mission. This one is in the middle of an ocean so

you will need breathing equipment." It appeared on everyone. "Bring back whoever is creating the surge in power." was his last comment before we were sent into the other dimension, time or hotdog.

When they opened their eyes they were in the middle of an ocean. An angelfish swam right by their faces and an eel passed along their right. "Ooooh! Pretty fishies!" Setsuna, Mimi and Raye said. Bunny, Hiei and Yusuke glared while Kurama, Rosa, Christar and Kuwabara inspected the sea life.

Raye attempted to swim, but the oxygen tank slowed her down. "Stupid mettle thingy." she aid before slipping it off.

"Don't do that! There's no oxygen here!" yelled Kurama

"So?" she said gurgling in the water. "I'm a water elemental, I can breath just fine. She said before swimming a ways. She looked back for a second "But it's cute that your worried." The rest of the team followed doggedly. Setsuna, Bunny, Mimi, Rosa and Kurama swam almost as well as Raye-san.

"Where did you learn to swim so well?" asked the fox.

"Part of our house was under water. Raye would drag us there every day to practice. I swear she's really an enchanted fish."

"That's not really nice, Setsy." complained Mimi.

"You know I love you, don't you Raye-chan?"

It is at this point they see a giant dome in the distance. "Ooooh look at that!" said Rosa.

"It appears to be a building of some sort." commented Kurama.

"Maybe it's a Merperson's home! Or maybe a government base to take over the ocean life to do their bidding!" Everyone ignored Setsuna's remark.

When they got close enough they could see the building inside of the bubble. Although building didn't cut it, it was more like a castle. It was made entirely of silver and jade. On the surface of the bubble was a door and a bell. Raye got there first and got the duty of ringing the bell.

"Wee!" she rung the doorbell to the tune of 'Imaginary' by Evanescence.

"RAYE-CHAN!!! IS THAT YOU?" down the railing of the stairs skated a fourteen year old girl with Dark blonde hair and hazel eyes. She stopped and flipped up her skateboard into her hands. She was five foot six, and was wearing a black hoodie with the words "If it don't have wheels and can't go high I'm not riding it!" written on it. Torn jeans covered her legs and van's covered her feet. She walked over to the door and let everyone in. Magically the water stayed outside of the door as they stepped into air.

"Everyone meet Catty, our sister-by-dating!" said Setsuna

"Konichiwa." she said bowing.

"Catty, this is Kurama, Hiei, Yusuke and Kuwabara." explained Raye. "We were sent to investigate strange surges of spirit energy. You wouldn't have anything to do with it would you?"

"Not that I know of." Catty shook her head.

"The bubble is emitting power." explained Bunny.

"It is?" asked Catty.

"Hey, Cat, why are you living down here anyway?" asked Rosa.

"Well I just finished watching 'The Little Mermaid' and thought that it would be cool to live underwater. So I got your dad to make this world for me. It even has a skating rink and big screen plasma TV!" explained the teen.

While Kurama, Hiei, Christar and Bunny sweat-dropped. Everyone else yelled "COOL!"

"You got any video games?" asked Yusuke.

"Are you kidding? A house isn't a house without video games! I have a whole collection. At least a hundred. Mostly the violent kind, and the racing kind. Oh and the newest Tony Hawk pro-skater! And-" as Catty went on explaining her collection the spirit detectives followed her into a room with a huge television and a whole wall full of…video games? On the other wall was a collection of movies ranging from everything Disney to 80's teenage flicks. All of them quite sappy.

"DAY-UM." Yusuke and Kuwabara said.

"Where is the rest of your collection?" asked Mimi.

"Oh they wouldn't all fit in here. There's more in the other room." she pulled back a curtain revealing a whole other room with nothing but video games and movies. This overwhelmed Yusuke and Kuwabara to the point that they passed out.

"This is so cool, Catty." commented Raye. They ignored the boys lack of consciousness.

"I hate to tell you this, but this environment is wasting a lot of spirit energy. Not only that but it is disturbing the ocean's natural wildlife and-" A thundering rumble interrupted Kurama's speech. A rift opened underneath their feet. "And its been feeding a C class demon that was imprisoned here 10000 years ago." he finished quickly.

"Oh hell." was all the sisters could say. Yusuke and Kuwabara popped up, quite conscious again.

"Rosa, can you transport all of my stuff back to my old room?" asked Catty.

"Sure thing, it might take a while though."

"We'll distract the demon-dude if he comes out." no sooner had Setsuna uttered those words that the 'demon-dude' crawled out of the crack in the earth. It was about eight feet tall with dark red markings along his scaly body. Fire edged around his face and talons. He had black eyes and fangs. A look of pure hatred seeped into his eyes.

"Uh Rosa, you might want to hurry it up a bit." said Setsuna.

* * *

Author: more violence will ensue! Yay!! (does a little happy dance)

Setsuna: woo.

Author: you don't sound very excited.

Setsuna: so.

Author: oh yeah I've been meaning to tell the readers about the cool Christmas gift I gave Bunny-chan. She's been putting it to use!

Setsuna: really. What was it.

Author: dude, you need to take some happy pills. ANYWAY. It was a (dramatic silence) Hiei plushy!!

Hiei: a what?

Author: oh my gosh. I have a Hiei in my brain! Is that what makes me have the uncontrollable erg to play with fire?

Cherry: no that's me.

Author: oh anyway. I got Bunny a Hiei plushy and I found out something. Hiei is bald! And he has no wiener!

Hiei: I am not bald!

Author: but you admit to having no penus?

Hiei: Why you little- (flays your wonderful author)

Author: (being flayed) AHH!! SAVE ME DARLING READERS!!!

Willow: Note time

1) The main three Hellsing siblings have elemental powers (others have elemental powers to… but I really don't wanna list them all) Bunny has fire, Raye has water, and Setsuna has air.

2) Catty is one of Raye's characters


	22. Great Balls of Fire!

Author: wow. I survived being flash-fried. You can never get rid of me!

Setsuna: it's true, I tried.

When we left off everyone was about to be killed by a demon that had been feeding off demon energy. Right? Right.

"Rosa, can you transport all of my stuff back to my old room?" asked Catty.

"Sure thing, it might take a while though."

"We'll distract the demon-dude if he comes out." no sooner had Setsuna uttered those words that the 'demon-dude' crawled out of the crack in the earth. It was about eight feet tall with dark red markings along his scaly body. Fire edged around his face and talons. He had black eyes and fangs. A look of pure hatred seeped into his eyes.

"Uh Rosa, you might want to hurry it up a bit." said Setsuna.

-----------------

"I'm going as fast as I can. Just distract him!" she yelled.

"Fine." Suna turned to the monster. "You're gonna regret messing with this family, Punk." She closed her eyes and put her hands in front of her. "Olympic storm!" A gust of wind flew at the demon encircling him. It threw him to the ground. The cracks previously formed got larger.

"Setsuna don't! your making too much damage." Catty yelled

"Most of our attacks do that!" Setsuna yells back.

"Let me give it a whirl." said Mimi. Her brown hair streamed back as she squinted her eyes in concentration. "Spirit disks." she yelled. A disk made of pink energy whirled to the demon. It hit him right in the solar plexus, cutting him deep. He roared in pain. His eyes leveled to her.

"I think you just made him mad." Bunny said.

"Can you do any better?" asked Mimi.

"Not in this environment no."

"Didn't think so." she said peevishly.

Christar was suddenly in front of them. She had what looked like a high power riffle in her hands. She aimed it at the large demon and pulled the trigger. A rain of bullets struck his body. When each one hit it made a popping noise and the wholes widened. Once the bullets cleared the demon they dropped out of the air. Now the red beast had five gapping holes in him. Blood seeped down.

He fell but sent fire down into the ground. Bunny's eyes widened "That much power

will-"

"Blow up the ground." finished Hiei.

"We need to get out of here NOW!" yelled Setsuna.

Back in the ocean a school of fished gathered round. The water around the bubble began to boil. Fire shot up around it sending burned fishes to leap out of the water. The bubble began to crack and turn brown from the heat. It finally exploded outwards letting water stream in. Luckily that cooled the fire. Unfortunately it was too late. Nothing lay there but rubble and burnt cloth.

* * *

Author: and the question is: would I kill off all my characters? Who knows. Wow. This is the second cliffy in a row! 


	23. Death

Author: doooendfosdjfwioefjekljfkldjgodngwoiefhwoehwoegihweiogwekfl wefowhnefowfnhwklgfwoirghoirwnsdvnsfklshfiowjewnfskdfmwjowhrwofknfngowrhgfijkgmcwoehjwf

Setsuna: whoa. What's wrong with you?

Author: I dunno. I just don't feel like writing. But my fans await!

Setsuna: Why don't you feel like writing. Are you mad at me? (teary eyes)

Author: of course not. Its just my obsession with Yaoi. It makes me unable to think of anything else.

Setsuna: that's so sad. (hugs Author)

Author: dude. I want Yaoi! But I'm to lazy to get on the internet! That's why I was able to write my new fic- wait did you just hug me?

Setsuna: Yeah.

Author: but your not touchy feely.

Setsuna: so? You needed comfort.

Author: OH MY GOD! YOU HAVE A SOUL!!

Setsuna: duh.

Author: your confusing me.

Raye: JUST START THE STORY ALREADY!!

Author: whoa, doesn't the typing g look cool? Ggggggggggggggggggg

Setsuna: well, she's obviously in the right mindset to make a story: her normal highness. So what's wrong?

Muse: I might be able to answer that.

Author: MUSE!!!!!!!! I missed you !!!!!(jumps on muse)

Cherry: now that she has her muse she can write now, Right?

Muse: not exactly. I need inspiration too. I did have a good idea to start this but… I forgot.

Everyone: AWWWW MAN!

Muse: I know, it sucks.

Willow: why don't you just start it and see where it goes?

Author: I could do that but… It's really dangerous.

Setsuna: how can that be dangerous?

Author: Well, there could be the unfortunate plot hole that annoys the hell out of people. There could be the nonsense that makes no sense. There could be the plot twist that is so stupid its evident it was forced, there's-

Setsuna: okay I get it! Just give it a try. We have the incase of emergency plot. (points to a glass box with a stack of paper. Beside it is a hammer and a plack that says: in case of stupidity and Pokemon-esk, brake glass and apply to story.)

Cherry: What is the emergency plot?

Author: I don't remember, its either everyone dies or its all just a dream.

Setsuna: okay. Time to start the story.

* * *

Eleven coffins were carried by horses. Around the boxes were crying people. All of the family of the bodies were there morning the loss of the heroes.

Finally the parade stopped. There where holes fit perfectly for the caskets. A podium had been set up. Koenma stepped up and said, "We are gathered to morn the loss of these ten courageous beings. The Hellsing sisters and our spirit detectives. They were lost because they sacrificed themselves to save all of us… Its just not fair!" The demigod banged his hand on the podium as tears welled up in his eyes.

The girls father, Gregory put his hand on the mans shoulder. He motioned for the coffins to be lowered into the ground.

"Game Over, Game Over," The words flashed across the screen.

"Crap. I can't believe I lost again!" screamed Catty. Slamming her fists on her jean covered legs. Those jeans led to green vans that looked ancient. Covering her torso was a black "Three Days Grace" hoodie. Her blonde hair was pulled up in a pony tail

"I can't either. I told you that you should have made Mimi use her disks, not Mina's darts." stated Bunny nonchalantly. "Don't you agree 'Suna?" She was wearing loose black pants that were covered in chains and straps. A violet long-sleeved shirt with "If you don't have any thing nice to say, don't expect to stay alive long" printed on it, complemented the mood. Whatever shoes she had on were mostly covered by her pants, only black tips were seen. Skull earrings crept up her ears and black cuffs covered her wrists.

Setsuna just stared blankly "It just creeps me out that you have a video game based on us fighting. That is just creepy. I keep on getting chills whenever I die. I'm beginning to think your doing it on purpose."

Catty grinned "However did you know?"

Setsuna glared "You're so mean to me." she lifted a drink to her lips. At least she would have if a piece of paper hadn't landed in it. This caused the drink to splash all over her, drenching her green silk tank top and jeans. "What the hell?" She looked over to where the paper had come from. Yusuke was slouching and grinning smugly, another paper ball in his hands. His jeans were faded, just as his tank-top looked worn.

Ooooh. You are SO DEAD!!" she dropped her glass and jumped at the guy. They both fell out of his chair at the impact. She straddled him, bringing her fist up to punch. He caught it before it impacted. They had a little arm wrestling match there. Finally, Setsuna decided to try a direct approach and jabbed her knee into his stomach.

"Oaf!" he said curling up into a ball. Setsuna stood and kicked him for good measure.

"Don't you dare do that again! Now I have to take another shower." She walked past Bunny who was staring out the window. She doubled back and looked to see what, or who Bunny was watching. It was a sweaty Hiei who of course had his shirt off. "Like what you see?" she whispered in her sisters ear.

She jumped. "Don't do that." she glared.

"Hey, I just wanted to say that you should probably close your mouth. You're drooling." Bunny continued to glare.

"Oh and you normally wear your drink?" the red eyed girl asked

Setsuna glared. "I get the point. The only one not acting stupid is Raye."

"Ohhhh Kurama-kun, can you come here for a moment?" Kurama walked into the kitchen. Setsuna and Bunny peeked through the doorway, spying.

In the middle of the room stood Raye. Her sister's mouths dropped. It wasn't that Raye was there, its what she was wearing. Her dark blue hair was pulled back in a high

pony tail that went to her butt. She was barefoot with limited jewelry. She was wearing dark blue short shorts with a chain and spiked belt. Her shirt was a black wife beater that barely hid her breasts and accentuated her thin waist. Her blue eyes all for Kurama.

"I can't seem to reach the light." she said, indicating the overhead kitchen light that had worn out, a new light bulb in her hands. "I can almost get it, see?" She rose on tip-toe and reached high, stretching her lithe body out and looking coyish as hell.

"Uh-hu." said Kurama who looked like he would pass out at any moment. He was wearing tight jeans tucked into suede black boots, a cream colored button up shirt completing the outfit.

"Oh!" Raye pretended to loose her balance and began to fall. Suddenly Kurama was there, holding her up. She had her hands on his chest and her body pressed to his. The light bulb was still cradled in her hand. "Thank you Kurama." she whispered. Their faces were perilously close. She backed up at the last moment, handing him the bulb. "Do you think you could put this in?"

Her sister turned away from the door. "Good Gods." said Setsuna.

"When did she learn to do that?" asked Bunny.

"And why didn't I think of that?" complained Sets'

They looked determinedly at each other. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Setsuna.

"Operation get laid under way." said Bunny.

* * *

Author: okie notes!

1) I will someday make that videogame.

2) FINALLY! I start on the relationships… don't kill me…


	24. Operation Get Laid

Author: Hiya folks! This is your wuvable author here!

Setsuna: since when are you 'wuvable'

Author: (gives Setsuna puppy dog eyes) Are you saying I'm not… cute (teary voice)

Setsuna: no, not really

Author: Meany. How could you not think I'm cute??

Setsuna: Duh, you don't even have a speck of leather on you

Author: (stairs at Suna) You are one screwed up chicky.

Setsuna: Just start the story ya freak.

Raye: don't they have such a kind relationship?

* * *

After Bunny and Setsuna saw the stunt Raye pulled to get the attention of everybody's favorite kitsune, they rushed upstairs to begin their own Operation get laid.

First to get done was Bunny (Setsuna having to take a shower first). She walked down the stairs and into the living room. Everyone's eyes got larger, especially the apparition known as Hiei.

Bunny was uncharacteristically slutty. No one even knew Bunny had such clothes in her closet. She had a tiny little belly shirt (black of course) That looked as if it had once been a wife beater until the stomach and neck been torn out. It had a rip from the frayed edges of the neck going down to just the top of her boobs. She had black baggy pants synched at the waist with a studded belt. Chains decorated her tiny hips. She wore black fingerless lacy gloves and silver rings. Red studs decorated her ears as well as one skull earring. On her feet were black hooker boots with more buckles than was necessary. Most surprising of all was the red belly button ring.

She walked over to Hiei, swaying her hips seductively. "So Hiei, ready for a challenge?" when he didn't answer she snapped her fingers in front of his face. When he still didn't seem to be able to concentrate, she grabbed his chin and lifted his face up to hers. "How bout this, flame-boy? You fight me and if I win, you get whatever you want, if I win I get whatever I want. Hmm? How does that sound to you?"

Hiei nodded and followed her outside. Yusuke shook his head and went back to his video game.

Not long after another set of footsteps could be heard coming down the steps. Yusuke glanced up and then glanced back down to his game. Once his brain processed what he had seen, his head jerked back up. In front of him stood none other than Setsuna Luna Hellsing.

She wore black suede boots with three inch heels. They stretched up to end at her knee. Tucked into those boots were tight leather pants. They were so tight that they looked pored on. They framed her voluptuous hips and also brought the eyes to a shiny bellybutton ring. Her shirt was a purple belly shirt with short sleeves. Underneath the shirt peeked out a bit of fishnet. Her wrists were decorated with jingly silver bracelets. A purple and black choker decorated her neck. Her hair was down to cascade over her shoulders and frame her face. Her earrings were a bunch of hoops. A glittery stud decorated her nose.

She smiled "Like what you see?"

"Huh?"

Her smile turned to a smirk "Eloquent as always 'Suke." She started walking to him. Her expression was that of a predator sighting her pray. She flopped down on the couch that was right behind where Yusuke was sitting on the floor. She stretched out and he could see her in a mirror that was hanging from the wall behind the TV.

"Suke?" she said watching him in the mirror.

"Yeah?"

"Can you turn around for a moment?" He did, the seen almost horror movie-esk. Setsuna looked at him coyishly "Do you want to do something for me?" she asked in a low voice.

"What?"

"No. Never mind." she looked down and then back up at him "It would involve getting up and I don't want to interrupt your game."

He turned the game off "It wouldn't interrupt my game." he said.

"Well…"

"Yes?"

"Could you…"

Yes?"

Setsuna smiled at the standing Yusuke "Could you get me a bottle of sake?"

Yusuke did an anime fall and Setsuna couldn't help but giggle. "Please Yusuke?"

"Fine." he said going to the kitchen.

He walked past Kurama and Raye on his way to the liquor cabinet. On the fridge was the note they found this morning explaining that the rest of the sisters (and Kuwabara) were on a mission for Koenma. Evidently the rest of them weren't needed.

He grabbed three bottles of sake and headed back to the living room glancing at his friends. For the second time that day he did a double take when he realized the two were making out. He shook his head and went into the living room. When he passed the door leading to the back yard he saw Bunny and Hiei throwing bursts of power at each other. "This is a fucking nut house." he muttered.

* * *

Author: All I can say is this chapter amused the hell out of me. 


	25. Fire Fights and Blackmail

Author: Yes I'd like to apologize for the weirdness that has progressed last chapter. I don't know what came over me.

Setsuna: Don't blame me, I just live here.

Author: RIIIIGHT. Anyways, I will eventually put in more violence, more family, and more booze. I just thought that I should start on the relationships since it IS The uh… 25th chapter. So enjoy the show.

* * *

Bunny and Hiei were in the back yard/training space and were a few feet apart. They were both floating in the air a few inches up and they both had their jagan eyes showing. Bunny threw a fireball at Hiei who dodged it expertly. His shirt was off like it always is when he began to fight. The only difference being that he had his nipple pierced.

Unfortunately the shiny metal kept distracting Bunny. Hiei sent a burst of flame at Bunny. She was entranced with how the flame reflected in that tiny bit of metal. It danced like the pretty burning stuff was inside the ring. She then noticed that the burning stuff was NOT inside the ring but was headed straight for her. "CRAP!" She caught the flame and absorbed it. Her gloves began to smolder and burn "SHIT!" she quickly stripped her hands of the gloves and threw them to the ground. They continued to burn but since there wasn't much material it was soon nothing but ash. "HIEI I WILL SKIN YOU ALIVE! THOSE WERE MY FAVORITE GLOVES!!!"

Hiei smirked "Hm."

Bunny glared. Her aura began to glow a brilliant red. The wind that previously was calm began to pick up and flow around her. Her aura turned clear, like a heat wave and she was thrown up into the air. "I am sure you are aware Hiei," she said her voice low and deliberate "That the white flame is the hottest part of the fire." She made a movement with her hand and her aura flew straight to Hiei. He dodged, but his skin was singed very badly and his clothes caught on fire. The brunt of the flame was caught by a tree that immediately turned to ash.

Hiei attempted to absorb the fire and succeeded mostly. The rest flew back to Bunny which she absorbed. He glared at her but held up his hand "You win."

"Humph. Apologize."

"For what?"

She glared and Hiei could see little flames dance in her eyes.

"I mean, sorry for burning your gloves."

Her expression took a complete 180 degree turn as she smiled. "Thank you. Do you need help tending to your wounds?" he nodded. She went and took his hand to help him up. A burst of flame went through her arm as Hiei sent the power she had thrown at him back at her. "HOLY CRAP!" She quickly took off her jewelry and boots as they began to melt into her skin. She then yelled "RAYE!!"

Her younger sister ran out, seeing both teens on fire and sent a blast of ice at them. The fire was put out but unfortunately shocked their system so much they both passed out. Raye rolled her eyes. "They HAD to interrupt my make out session didn't they? God sometimes they are so inconsiderate, I mean who would catch themselves on fire when a nice girl like me was trying to get some. GOSH!"

Kurama appeared "Did you say something?"

"Oh… Yeah. Can you help me carry these two into the house?" She asked her red headed hunny.

"Sure." he scooped up Hiei as Raye carried Bunny. They decided to take the elevator (remember they live in a friggin mansion) As it dinged onto the second floor Kurama started to get off and take Hiei to his room.

"Wait." Raye grabbed his shoulder. "I have a better idea." she smiled wickedly

Yusuke brought back Setsuna's bottle of sake. "Here you go Your Highness" he said sarcastically.

"Thank you 'Suke." She took a sip from the bottle then looked at it with a pout on her face.

Yusuke sighed. "Is there anything else I can get you?"

She perked up "Can you get me the jar of whipped cream cheese icing in the pantry?"

He rolled his eyes "Sure."

He went back to the kitchen and opened the door to the pantry. He looked at the first shelf and began shifting through the junk. He reached up to turn on the light, then realized there was no light bulb in the fixture. "Perfect" he cursed.

"Second shelf down to your right behind the cream corn."

"Thanks." he said finally located. He then realized that the voice had been male and one he didn't recognize. He whirled around in time to see what looked like a little man go through the wall.

Yusuke went back to the living room "You know there are gnomes in the… Holy."

"There are gnomes in the Holy?" Setsuna was sprawled out on the couch facing him. Her head was dangling off the couch, so she was looking at him upside down. This position had her back arched, her breasts pressing against the material of her shirt. "Suke? Do you have my icing?" he handed her the container. She opened it. "You didn't get me a spoon? That's okay." she put her finger in and scooped up a glob of the sugary goodness. She then passed her fingers through her lips and sucked the icing off of them. Yusuke watched her and licked his own lips. "Yusuke? Your looking kinda funny…"

She was cut off by Yusuke pushing his lips to hers. Never loosing contact she turned around, so she wasn't upside down. He finally drew away and licked the remains of icing from his lips. They looked at each other for a second then went at each other again, acting as if they would devour each other through their mouths. They ignored the sounds of "RAYE!!" from Bunny and continued their meal until they parted again. Setsuna rolled herself up so she was now sitting.

"So" her voice faltered and she tried again "So. What game were you playing?"

"What?" Yusuke asked slightly confused.

"The game you were playing when I came in here. It looked fun and I was wondering if we could play." she said, as if talking to a child.

"Wouldn't you rather be doing… oh I don't know…me?" he said, so not sounding like a child.

Setsuna laughed. "Now Yusuke, patience is a virtue."

He looked at her "Since when was either of us virtuous?"

She laughed again "Since I felt like playing a game known as 'mess with Yusuke's head' Its really fun, you should try it."

Luckily for Yusuke, he didn't have to puzzle out that comment since Raye and Kurama came back into the room. "Guys. We have the best blackmail in the whole eternal world!" Raye pulled out a digital camera and showed Setsuna and Yusuke the pictures on it.

"Oh my god, Bunny's gonna kill you!" said Setsuna stifling back laughter

"She's gonna have to fight Hiei for that." said Yusuke.

"But it'll be worth it!" Raye smiled devishly.

Author: What did Raye do? You can guess if you want, I'll give you a prize if you get it correct by the time I update. Oh and also, I don't own YYH, but I do own a can of Whipped Cream cheese icing that I was eating while typing this up, which is almost as good.

* * *

Willow: Notes…

1) I own Bunny's gloves. They are awesome

2) fire play is fun. I enjoyed writing that

3) Despite the helpfulness of this particular gnome, most of the time they steel stuff from us. They especially like stealing library/school books. There is one at my old house, and there was one in one of Bunny's old lockers… as well as other life forms… like cookies… don't ask…


	26. Snogging

The children (aka Raye, Setsuna, Yusuke and Kurama) were sitting on the couch watching Family Guy when they heard it. Two ear splitting screams. Down the stairs rushed a panicking Bunny and Hiei. Bunny had put on a robe and Hiei put on boxers

"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING YOU PERVERT!" Bunny yelled at Hiei

"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING YOU WERE THE ONE WRAPPED AROUND ME!"

"I WOULD NEVER DO THAT! YOU MUST HAVE DRUGGED ME AND RAPED ME YOU SICK RAPIST!"

"WHO YOU CALLING RAPIST? YOU PROBABLY RAPED ME!"

"Ahem." came a voice from the couch "Uh neither of you were raped." said Raye "All we heard from upstairs after you went up there were screams of pleasure."

"Yeah, you scarred Raye for life you perverts." said Setsuna "If you knew the booze would have made you horny you shouldn't have drunken it, I mean come on you guys are grown adults, be responsible for the example you are setting for your younger sister." she finished before lighting a cigarette.

The poor fire demons eyes were as huge as saucers "We did what?"

"You had sex, did the nasty, did it like they do on the discovery channel, Hiei you got laid I am so proud of you!" said Yusuke with a grin as he bummed a puff off of Setsuna's cigarette.

"Yeah we even have pictures." said Raye as she held out the Polaroid. Quick as the flash (comic book reference alert) Hiei grabbed the picture and all that was left was a pile of ash

"Oh you seriously think that's the only picture?" said Yusuke scoffing

"Yeah, I already put it on my Myspace." said Raye beaming

"Yepers, and on my Facebook." put in Setsuna.

Bunny's eyes narrowed "I am going to kill you."

"You do and I'll tell dad." said Setsuna blinking

"Nark."

Hiei banger."

"Yusuke snogger."

Setsuna blinked "Yeah? So?" and she reached over and pressed Yusuke's lips against hers.

Before they got to into their make out session gagging sounds ensued. When they came up for air they noticed everyone had gone into the kitchen trying to get away from the couple.

When they walked into the kitchen they saw Bunny pouring a glass of absinthe for herself. "Your sure you should be drinking that? You know what happened last time." said Setsuna before producing another picture. Bunny zapped it with her flame and Setsuna made another appear in her other hand, which was soon also made into dust.

This continued until Bunny got board and turned to her drink. "I don't care, I just can't believe I slept with that person." she said indicating Hiei who muttered something under his breath that was either "You think I feel good about it?" or "I like pudding." I'm leaning toward the pudding one.

"Well there is a good reason for that, it's 'cause you didn't sleep with him." said Setsuna, sipping from a bottle of vodka that appeared from the air.

"SetSUNA! Why did you have to tell them?" shrieked Raye.

"What're your saying I didn't, then the pictures..."

"Were staged by Raye." Setsuna explained.

"Raye-chan." Bunny turned to her slowly.

"But, you guys weren't going fast enough, I mean Setsuna and I already have made out with our boys, you just needed a little nudge to finish the seduction, I mean who fights when they are trying to get laid?"

"Uh hello, his shirt disappears when he's fighting, if that isn't a sign of enjoyment than I don't know what is."

"Well you were taking to long."

"We all have ways of getting what we want." pointed out Setsuna.

"Yeah, Setsuna plays hard to get, you do the direct thing, and I beat the shit out of them." said Bunny.

"You did not beat the shit out of me." said Hiei

"Details, details." Bunny said.

"So your playing hard to get huh?" smirked Yusuke.

Setsuna turned to him and leaned into him leaving only a breath in between their lips "You ever want to feel these lips again, I would suggest you wipe that smirk off your face." she said before smiling. Yusuke had a lusty look in his eyes and his smirk was gone "Good boy." she said before dipping her head for a chaste kiss.

"What are you doing to my sister?"

* * *

Author: noooootesssss

1) I like this chapter

2) I have no notes

3) but I want to take up space

4) so now I'll stop.


	27. SHOPPING!

"What are you doing to my sister?" everyone turned to see a seventeen year old boy. In the doorway stood a guy who was about 5'7, he wouldn't be that imposing except for the expression on his face. That expression said that he would kill you as soon as look at you. He had short silver hair that was spiked. His glaring eyes were a familiar blood red. He wore torn jeans and a black t-shirt. His shoes were combat boots. The only adornment on him was a watch, studded bracelet and an eyebrow piercing in his left eyebrow.

The boys' heads swiveled over to Bunny who was leaning up against the counter, her arms crossed. She had her silver hair spiked in the back where it was short, the front long part being held out of her eyes by a red bandana that was also hiding her jagan eye. Her uncovered red eyes held surprise. She wore a navy blue long-sleeved shirt with the words 'Whazzup dock?' on them. Her legs were covered in jeans that were tucked into combat boots. (she had gotten dressed while no one was looking)

The boys looked back to the intruder and saw a twin of Bunny. Sure it was a taller, more masculine twin but there DEFINITELY were some similarities.

"I said, what are you doing to my sister?" he said a thread of anger in his voice.

Yusuke looked at Setsuna who he still had pressed up against him "Oooooohhhh. You're one of the many siblings. I was beginning to wonder if they had any brothers or if there were just sisters."

"I SAID, WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SISTER!" He sent a fire ball souring at Yusuke, ripping him from Setsuna and throwing him into the wall.

When Yusuke crawled out of the rubble he faced the silver haired psycho (Mwahahaha! Bunny has been dethroned!) with a sword to his throat. "You will die for touching my sister."

Behind the boy with a big sword, Setsuna creped up and clapped her hands over his ears. "OW!"

"Next time you hurt my boyfriend I will do more than box your ears. You may be a boy but I am still older and TALLER THAN YOU DAMNIT!!!!!!!!" she screamed

Bunny came up and patted her sister on the back "We get it Sets, you're heap big strong woman. Don't bust his eardrums anymore, he just bruised Yusuke. No one's dead."

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HOUSE?" yelled Rosa. All of the other siblings were back. Everyone looked up from there places except for the mysterious silver haired boy.

Setsuna pointed to him "Van did it."

Everyone was sitting at the table drinking except for Rosa who was levitating bits of wall back to their places and sealing it with energy. Van had gauze over his ears and Yusuke was bandaged. Shopping bags were everywhere.

"So mom sent money and you didn't tell me?" asked Setsuna not even looking up from her tea.

"We knew you'd spend it all so we decided we would shop without telling you. Sorry about keeping you guys out of the loop Raye and Bunny but we knew you'd tell Sets' and we wanted stuff!" said a nine year old girl with short green hair and bright green eyes. Her five foot three frame was wearing jeans and a orange t-shirt shirt.

"Wait, when did you get here Pooky?" asked Setsuna.

"They picked me up on the way to the mall, Shorty's here too!" She pointed to a twelve year old girl with midnight blue hair and blue eyes. She was around five foot six and was wearing jeans and a Blue hoodie.

"Pooky I'd expect that out of but Chris?" Raye said turning teary eyes to her.

Christar looked uncomfortable "I needed a new bike."

"I needed a new skateboard." defended Catty

"I was out of books." Rosa explained

"I played all of my old video games 39392728 times already!" exclaimed Mimi

"My computer was busted." chimed in Shorty

"I ran out of paints." finished Pooky.

"But what about me??" asked Setsuna "Did it ever cross your mind that I may need stuff too?"

"Hey," broke in Yusuke "Is that guy okay. He's just staring at the table and he's starting to creep me out."

"He can't hear. I busted his eardrums. He'll be better in an hour or so." said Setsuna.

"What? How does that make sense?" asked Kuwabara who hopped out of the pantry all tied up.

"I thought we told you that if you came out we'd torture you slowly and painfully." said Rosa, pointing her scythe at the poor shmuch.

"Fine." he said hopping back into the pantry dejectedly.

"He does bring up a good point, how quick do you guys heal?" asked Kurama

"Well either as soon as the author forgets we're hurt, or when she just needs us not to be hurt anymore." explained Raye.

"Oh." said Kurama, still confused.

"So if he can't hear me I could say oh, he's a retard who will never get laid cause he's uglier than Kuwabara and he wouldn't do anything?"

Yusuke was hit over the head with Van's sword "I'm deaf not retarded, asshole." said Van as he put up his sword.

"Do keep in mind that he's related to Bunny. It may keep you from getting anymore bruises." Setsuna said. A cinderblock hit her in the face though that hardly phased her. She took a sip of her tea before saying "See what I mean?" as Bunny glared at her.

* * *

Author: Hiya tootsies and Dudes! I'm BAAAAAACCCCCKKKKKK aren't ya happy? So yeah, I'z gots some 'splanin to do

Setsuna: Are you gonna explain why your talking like Ricky Ricardo?

Author: shut up Lucy, Anyway. Most of the characters of mine/Bunny's/Raye's are based on real people. Yes, most of the siblings actually exist O.o o.O o.O annnnnyway. Van is my LITTLE cousin, whom we shall call…Van. (yes I know, I'm original) anyway. He is my younger cousin (by about a week) who at one time was shorter to me (but not anymore-.-) hence Setsuna's tantrum about being taller than Van. (look at my bio people, I'm SHORT) Anyway a few of you may have realized that Van's name is in fact VAN HELLSING. -.- I am not the writer of Hellsing, nor am I the writer of Yu Yu Hakusho, if I was I'd be much richer thank you very much. I'd also like to point out that my cousin chose his own name. So he's the one that's unoriginal, not me! That's all for now, goodbye. .

Willow: more notes…

1) Van isn't over reacting. That's how my cousin would (probably) react… that is why Author-chan doesn't date… among other reasons…

2) Pooky and Shorty are characters of two friends we had in… eighth grade? Yes.

3) Once again I defied the laws of Physics. So there.


	28. Attack of the Ladybugs

Author: I would like to state that I wasn't the only insane mind working on this chapter, Raye-chan helped. So applaud!

* * *

For a while everyone sat around the table in silence. "Wow, where did all the excitement go?" asked Mimi

"Yeah, it's kind of boring without anybody trying to kill you." pointed out Shorty.

"We could go see how the rebuilding of the school is going." suggested Kurama.

Kurama's suggestion was met with crickets chirping. Then someone randomly threw a bar of soap that hit him in the face, throwing him from the chair. AHHHH!!! NOT THE SOAP! ANYTHING BUT THE SOAPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!

"How about not." Said Bunny.

"Hm. If violence is all that is amusing I could get demons to chase you." pointed out Hiei. Bacon flew through the air to hit him in the nose.

"BACON!!" screamed Raye, who pounced on the meaty substance to gobble it down.

"Uh Raye? That's not Bacon." Pointed out Christar. "It's a dog treat."

Raye looked down at what remained of the meaty-ish substance "IT'S BACON!!!" yelled the girl before scarfing the remains down.

"I know!" said Rosa "The Fair is in town!"

Thus began the adventure known as: The Carnival of Horrors!

"P-I-C-K-L-E! P-I-C-K-L-E! P-I-C-K-L-E! And pickles are so Green-o" sang Setsuna "Oh how I love Carnivals. You know I once was in a circus?" She said to Yusuke.

Bunny was wearing baggy jeans and a red long-sleeved shirt with 'The rabid clowns are right behind you' on it. Her steel toed boots clonked in steps with Hiei's black clad form. They were in the back of the line of teenager-esk beings. In front of them was Catty in a black "Labyrinth" hoodie, jeans and red vans. She was explaining the wonders of videogames to Mimi and Rosa. Rosa was wearing a wispy red skirt with a black 't, a fur lined black coat and black high healed boots. Mimi was wearing Cargo pants, flip-flops and a pink long sleeved shirt with a bunny on it. In front of them Shorty in dark jeans, a baby blue t-shirt under a dark blue zip up hoodie and Pooky in torn jeans, orange t-shirt and black jacket. In front of them, Raye in a plaid skirt, black System of a Down 't with a blue long sleeved shirt underneath and motorcycle boots was walking hand and hand with Kurama in jeans and a green 't with a green jacket over it and was chatting at Christar in black pants, gray t-shirt under a black trench coat. In front of them was a silent Van dressed in the same outfit as last chapter, but with a black trench with red silver lining who was glaring at the singing Setsuna. Speaking of the crazy lady she was wearing a black leather skirt, fishnet stockings with black hooker boots, a purple velvet halter top and a black leather trench coat with leopard print insides.

"Come on everybody! We're almost there!" yelled Setsuna pointing to the entrance.

"YAY!" squealed Raye, dragging Kurama faster.

They reached the gate and paid their $5.50.

"I want to go to the Farris Wheel!"

"I wanna go to the hall of mirrors!"

"Haunted House!"

"Games!"

"Carousel!"

"Oh Teacups!"

"Swings!"

"Roller coaster!"

"COTTON CANDY!!!"

Everyone ran in different directions. Someone called out "Meet up at Water Slide at 6!"

With Setsuna

She dragged Yusuke to the hall of mirrors. That's a surprise. Someone as vain as Setsy wanting to go to the hall of mirrors? Who'da thunk it. "I'm not that vain you retard." Setsuna muttered.

"What?" asked Yusuke

"Nothing. I love the maze of mirrors. You could just get lost here." she said dreamily.

She turned, looking in a distorted mirror that was tented blue. Her eyes squinted as she caught an extra reflection "Aw crap. And I thought I was on vacation."

With Bunny

The crazy Pyro of course chose the Roller coaster. It was called…The Wildfire "So let me get his straight. You get on a man made…thing that launches you at high speed on a rickety rail with only a measly piece of cloth keeping you from death?"

"Yeah. Great right?" They were being strapped in

Hiei smiled "Hell yeah."

"WEEEEE!!!!" squealed 7 kids. "I've WALKED faster." said Hiei, unimpressed.

"Yeah. But hey, it's less work." said Bunny.

They reached a bend and were about to go into a cave when Hiei said "Bunny. I don't think that opening leads to the rest of the ride."

With Raye

Raye of course decided to satiate her sweet tooth with cotton candy. Kurama bought her one that was bigger than her head. She bit off a big chunk. "What time were we supposed to meet back?" asked Kurama, the ever vigilant.

"Uh… I think like 6:30."

They went onto the teacups and began to wheel around and around. Raye's cotton candy flew away "NO!!! JOEYYY!!!"

Kurama's eyes widened as he saw what was happening around them "Um. I have a feeling that's not the worst of our problems."

With Catty

Christar was dragged along by Catty to the game section of the fair. "C'mon Chrisy! I challenge you to a gun duel!" Catty squealed stopping at the booth where you shoot all the balloons you can. She gave a dollar to the booth owner and picked up her gun. She looked to her sister-by-dating and saw her totally unimpressed face. "PLEEAASE!"

Christar smiled, picked up a gun, and shot. It went right through the balloon and through the wall on the other side. "Whoa. This is real." she said looking at it.

"That's strange." said Catty "Usually they make these, oh I dunno, safe? What's with this dude?" she asked the booth owner. He didn't answer "Yo! Dude! Whazzup? You been drinking?" she said running her hand over his eyes. "Uh-oh this ain't good."

With Rosa

Mimi and Rosa dragged Van to the Farris wheel. "Come on Van cheer up! It's a carnival. You can't be your own, stick in the mud I'm-such-a-badass self here!" said Mimi.

"Watch me." he said.

"Hey, Mimi? Where were we supposed to meet back?" asked Rosa

"Um, the food court I think."

They were sitting in the little cages going in a circle. "How is this fun?" asked Van.

"Look outside. It's so pretty!" said Mimi, her face pressed to the glass. "Hey! What's that!" she said pointing out.

"I dunno. Hm." Rosa looked over her shoulder "What the hell's going on down there."

"Did this ride get suddenly faster?"

With Pooky

Pooky and Shorty skipped to the haunted house hand in hand. They bespelled the ride runner so that they saw the three people coming on the ride, but not the two others that snuck into the last seats. They giggled at the moaning sounds and discussed whether or not the ride would be campy or cool.

"AHHH!!" screamed three kids.

"I'm sensing something coming closer." said Shorty.

"I feel it too. Looks like this won't be that campy." They exchanged glances.

* * *

Author: NOTES!!!

1) Explanation for the soap: I've only ever roll played once. In that time they kept on throwing soap at me! I don't know why (okay, I was playing a guy who was kinda an ass… like Setsuna only a chick) and it scarred me for life.

2) The Bacon thing Raye came up with. In fact most of this beginning part was Raye's fault. Not mine.

3) lol… the Wildfire holds a special place in my heart. Inside joke… maybe someday you'll be introduced to the fic that explains it.

4) something about Raye, she names things that belong to her. It's kinda like the fish who said "I name you Squishy from now on you shall be my Squishy" Her most used name is Joey.


	29. Smoking Gun

A lighter flame rose to life. It was lifted to catch the tip of a cigarette on fire. The tip flared orange as lungs sucked in air. The cigarette was taken away from pink tinted lips and blue smoke rose into the air. Setsuna had been in dire need of a cig. Now that her addiction was filled for the moment she turned, a gun suddenly appearing in her hand. A bullet rang out and glass cracked. Fragments filled the air. Yusuke dove for the floor, his eyes closed tightly. When the deadly shards had landed, Setsuna stood in the middle, miraculously unharmed. She put her cigarette to her lips and took another drag.

Laughing filled the hall of mirrors. "Don't you know it's seven years bad luck to brake a mirror? Lets see, seven times five would be… 35 years. Oh my."

"Wow, it can do simple math. Pretty good for a mysterious disembodied voice." Setsuna said sarcastically.

Yusuke stood up, brushing pieces of glass from his person. "You could have warned me you were gonna do something stupid." He said glaring "You could have gotten me killed!"

She pouted "Awwww, but I wanted to be melodramatic! It's so rare to have a really good gun scene anymore. There's not near as much violence in this job as I thought there would be."

Now, by this time the disembodied voice was feeling quite left out. So, what better thing to do than to create a storm of deadly fire? I can't think of anything, can you?

Well, the baddie couldn't. Fire started raining down from the sky. "Holy Hell!" screeched Setsuna, loosing her cool. She put her hands up and a wall of wind caught the fire and pushed it back to the ceiling. "RUN LIKE HELL DAMNIT!"

Bunny

Bunny glanced at Hiei. They grabbed the bar in front of them and pushed, releasing them from its grip. Then they flipped , putting their palms on the back of the seats. They landed simultaneously on the tracks, as if choreographed. They saw the roller coaster go into the cave and disappear. Bunny jumped on the top of the plastic prop and stomped to the other side of it and looked down. Sure enough, the roller coaster had reached the other side, but it was empty. She walked back and jumped down.

"Want to see where they went?" she asked. "Either that, or we can go torment clowns. You're call."

"Clowns, or battle. That's a tough decision." He said. Then he sighed "I suppose saving the day would be the responsible thing."

Bunny smiled "Plus, I bet whoever did this would be more of a challenge then stupid clowns.

"That too." They headed into the cave and disappeared.

Raye

Kurama grabbed the wheel, trying to stop the teacups. Unfortunately, they were out of control. It was getting way to fast. They flew out of the child's ride. Kurama landed on his feet but Raye kept on going. She landed on all fours on a stone wall that appeared there. Or rather that they appeared amid. There were four of them, plus a floor and ceiling to match. There were people passed out around them. The only movement was their breathing. They observed this in a moment of seconds. Raye un-matrix-ed herself from the wall, landing on her feet from the 10 ft fall.

"Where the hell are we?" she asked.

Catty

The man's eyes were blue and unseeing. "He's a golith." said Catty. "Just a doll, not real."

"Well I have a feeling he's the only one. If these guns are real I'm guessing-"

A little girl tossed a ring over a milk bottle, but it didn't stop. In fact it grew spikes. And started heading towards the little girl that threw it. A bullet hit it, making it land harmlessly on the ground. Catty stood with her gun still pointed. "This is so not good." she repeated.

Rosa

Indeed, the ride had gotten faster. Then it stopped all together. Only no one was in it. The occupants were now in the same cave that Raye and Kurama were in.

Well, technically they were falling in the cave. Rosa put her arms out, summoning energy to hold her. Mimi threw her hand out and a disk made of spirit energy appeared under her, holding her aloft. Van grabbed his sword, plunging the blade into the wall, slowing his decent. The sound of nails against a chalkboard was the result. Well, that and a large slice in the rock. The sword stopped about seven feet from the ground. Van put his feet to the wall and pulled. The sword slid out and he flipped, landing on his feet. Both Mimi and Rosa landed in front of him.

At that same moment a new shipment of people fell from the air and a moment after Hiei and Bunny appeared in the midst of them.

Raye and Kurama stood, joining the group. "Don't bother looking, there's no way out." said Kurama.

"So what are we gonna do?" asked Mimi.

"We wait." replied Van.

"Well they better come soon." Hiei said "I was promised a fight."

Pooky

A dummy fell from the ceiling. It was headless, its head in its hands. The eyes rolled up and the mouth opened saying "You shouldn't have come, you'll never leave now…in one place." it cackled.

"EEEP!" squealed the preteens. As Pooky and Shorty came into view the eyes rolled to them and said "Oh. You two are going to have fun here. We haven't had fresh meat in soo long." They realized that the dummy wasn't really a dummy, but real.

Shorty reached over and put her hand on the dead body's arm. "Release the soul inside you." she said. The eyes closed and he dropped his head. A distinct smell of rotting flesh filled the hall.

"Ew. couldn't you wait until after we're gone to release him." Pooky said.

"Sorry."

The car stopped with a screech. Everyone screamed. A voice came over the intercom. "We are experiencing some technical difficulties. You will have to walk the rest of the way…if you survive."

The girls rolled their eyes "Maybe it will be campy after all."

* * *

Author: NOTES…

1) I realized that I like having glass blow up. I included it in another of my stories… or chapters… I don't remember which… but I did.

2) Tormenting clowns is fun

3) A golith is usually made by someone with magical powers out of mud. It's really cool.

4) Shorty has magic powers, she's not a necromancer. Just magic.


	30. Races and new faces

With Setsuna

The building exploded, raining shards of glass upon the ground. Flames licked at the sky. People started running, attempting to get away from the destruction. Two figures lay on the ground, one with blue hair, one with black.

In the Cave

"Dude. What the Hell? We were riding on the roller coaster and then we weren't. Hay! Guys! Wow, Look who's here Bobby!" An eleven year old girl stood out of the rubble and bounded forward, another figure behind her. The excited girl had blue hair with pink cotton candy coloured streaks that went well with her emerald green eyes. Her five foot seven frame was wearing a pink tutu and a tight pink shirt that said "YAY" on it in blue lettering. She had on flowered pink flip-flops.

The figure behind her had on a oversized gray coat over a white button up shirt that was unbuttoned to reveal a faded green t-shirt. Large and torn jeans completed the outfit. This was contrasted with the fact that she was only about four foot eleven. She had long brown hair pulled back from her face and green eyes. She appeared to be about seventeen.

"B.B? Is that you? And Bobby? What are you doing here?" asked Raye.

"We were riding the roller coaster, what else?" said the blue haired chick, crossing her arms and thrusting her hip out.

"Pssh. No need to get sarcastic, Hun." Rosa said, Mirroring B.B.'s stance.

"Is this another sister?" Kurama whispered to Raye

"Yeah. Blue Bear (B.B.) and Bobby, meet Kurama and Hiei. Whenever we meet up with Setsuna you'll meet Yusuke…"

In the distance they could hear an explosion.

Everyone turned to Bunny and Hiei. "What?" Bunny asked, defensively "I didn't do it this time!"

With Catty

"Something is powering the items here. If we can track where it's coming from then maybe we can disable it." suggested Christar.

Catty nodded, stepping to the ring that just moments ago had wicked spikes. She bent down and tightened her hand around it. She closed her eyes for a few seconds when they snapped open. "I can sense a psychic thread from it. Follow me." She raised her hand and a skateboard fell out of the sky. It had electric green wheels. The bottom had a revolver painted on, smoke spiraling out to cover the rest of the board. Figures appeared in the smoke. There was roses with spiked vines, big wildcats, fairy beings and who knows what else.

"Awesome board. Even better than your last one. You do it yourself?"

"You know it! Come on. Just try and keep up." she said, striking a grin.

"Oh really?" Chris put her hand out, a key and ring in her hand. She pressed a button and in the distance Catty can hear and engine rev. Up spun a motorcycle.

"An original?"

"Yep." it was black with a nightscape on it in white and gray. The metal was all chrome.

"Let's go." she mounted the bike and kicked it into life. "You sure you don't want to ride with me?" she looked down at the board with wheels that was in her sister's hands.

Catty glared "Wanna race? I'll beat you."

"Okay. Let's go." They both took off. It didn't take long for Chris to realize they were headed straight for the duck dunk game. "Catty?" before she could ask what her sister thought she was doing they were too close. She pulled up on her bike, hopping that she did it in time to go over the water and not into the water. Catty ground the edge of the concrete water container, as sparks flew into the air. They both landed on the other side safe and sound. Before they could jump for joy a golith stepped in front of them. They both swerved around him as another golith started for them.

"ZOMBIES!!!" Catty screamed. She pulled out a gun and shot at it. It kept on coming, but it was too late, they were past it and heading for another booth. Catty spotted a plank going up the side of it. She headed towards that, pushing off to speed up. She was slightly behind Chris, who also used the board as a ramp. She cleared the air moments after her sister, grabbing the nose of her board and pushing with her feet. She flipped it, landing on it a second after it hit the ground. The momentum caused it to speed past her sister.

They saw stairs ahead of them, going down to the auditorium shaped like a Greek arena. Catty jumped, grinding the rail all the way down the stairs while Christar pulled up on her bike, clearing the stairs altogether. They landed simultaneously on the stage. Catty kicked up her board and disappeared it into the air. Christar got off of her bike, putting down the brake.

"Are we here?" Chris asked.

"This I were the psychic line ends." Catty said.

"Hey guys! I saw you ride in that was awesome!" They turned to see a group of five walking towards them. Three were girls the other two were boys.

The one leading was a sixteen year old girl. She had long black hair pulled into a pony tail. She was dressed in a baby blue sweater, a pair of jeans, and blue flip-flops. She was pretty medium height, about five seven. She was looking at them with calculating black eyes.

The one that had spoken was younger looking, about fourteen. As the youngest

looking she was also the shortest, being only four foot six. She had blue-silver hair that was pulled back in a pony tail. Her small form was covered with a black spaghetti strapped tank top and baggy black pants. Silver bracelets wound their way almost to her elbow. Her red eyes were

sparkling with humor, causing the fact that her pupils were shaped like wings to stand out in sharp relief.

The fourteen year old guy at her side had straight black hair with red tips that fell to his shoulders. He was around her height, with big black pants belted around his hips. His torso was covered with a black tank top with a cape over it, even though it was way too hot to be wearing it. He had on black boots and bandages around his hands and up his arms. His red eyes with black stripes were all for the silver haired girl beside him.

Beside them walked a sixteen year old girl with strawberry blonde hair framing her face. She was the tallest, around six foot seven. She had on a pink tank top and a powder blue skirt with baby doll shoes. Her cheerful eyes were a light blue.

The fourteen year old boy that started walking just ahead of the group had brown hair and blue eyes. He was around six foot, and looked like he walked straight off of Star Wars. He even had a light saber at his waist.

"Dan!" Catty squealed, running and tackling the Jedi dude.

"Catty! You're here! It's so good to see you! What's up?" he said smiling down at her.

"Someone's here who's trying to take over and mind control people." explained Chris.

"Oh that? Yeah that's why we're here too." said the blonde girl.

"Oh my gosh Mina it's good to see you! And Pheo and Nix, and Amy! You guys are here too!" said Catty.

"Now that you've finished this family reunion, maybe we could get down to business." said a voice behind them.

With Pooky

"Hey! It's Pooky and Shorty!" someone shouted. Light came on from somewhere. When eyes adjusted they could see it was coming from a flashlight. They also noticed that a group of people had come over

The one who spoken was a nine year old girl who was quite short at four foot seven. She was wearing a blue plaid skirt, a white blouse and a blue tie with a blue over jacket. She had her long blue hair in a half pony tail. Her kind blue eyes were sparkling with mirth.

She was walking hand in hand with a nine year old boy who was only slightly shorter than her. He had shocking dark red hair and neon blue eyes. He was wearing all black, the only colour a flash of silver on his belt. He was glaring angrily at everything and everyone.

A light blue haired thirteen year old girl walked next to them. She looked dainty in a red sun dress and sandals. Her five foot four frame accentuated the childish look. However, her husky blue eyes were glancing anxiously, making sure everyone was alright. She acted like the mother.

The thirteen year old boy she was hanging onto had brown hair and green eyes. He was quite a bit taller than her at five foot nine. His clothes included black pants and a jacket, underneath which was a white wife beater. He had a calm smile on his face.

The fifteen year old girl who was holding the flashlight had black hair braided down her back. Her five foot seven frame was thin, contrasting with the baggy black pants she was wearing. Her T-shirt was a red colour. Her brown eyes looked cross.

"Oh my gosh Shorty, its Umi, Yota, Luna, Alex and Jamina! What are you guys doing here?"

"Apparently we're going to kick bad guy ass." said Jamina, eyebrow raised.

* * *

Author: NOTES

1) B.B (short for Blue Bear) is a character of a friend we had in… seventh grade I believe

2) Bobby is my character that is loosely based on the character "Silent Bob" as in Jay and…

3) Bunny has a reputation for blowing stuff up.

4) Christar has a LITTLE obsession with Motorcycles, and she designs her own. Catty has the same thing for skateboards.

5) Dan, Mina, and Amy are Raye's characters

6) Pheo and Nix are Bunny's characters

7) Amy, Yota, Luna, Alex and Jamina are all Raye's Characters as well.


	31. Free Extra Story!

Author: Hello boys and girls and welcome to the special story insert! Now, if you could keep my characters straight then bully for you! You can skip this chapter but be fore worned. Some of these characters havent been introduced into the story yet! So if you want to have a special sneek peek of next chapter stay. Or if you're like me and don't understand WHAT the hell is goin on with all these characters, read this and understand the characters then reread the previous chapters so you can get a clear view in your head.

Jamina: Hold it! You're confused? You're the author!

Author: I DIDN'T CREATE YOU!!! huddles in a corner, rocking back and forth. Then looks at the audience and stops sucking thumb Sorry for the outburst. Keep in mind, I only created…mmm… maybe ¼ of the characters. The rest were created by Chi and Bunny. And MOST of their characters don't have as much info in the bio as mine do so I don't know them as well. Luckily, through the magick of technology i emailed Raye-chan the stats and she mailed them back and cleared up some things! So anyway, onto on to the show!

Setsuna: Yo! I'm Setsuna Luna Hellsing. If you don't know who I am by now you're retarded. (said while smoking)

Author: Setsuna….

Setsuna: I'm around 6"2, I drink and smoke, I'm rude and crude…And I'm smarter than Kurama.

Author: Thank you Sets' for that… inspired intro. Next.

Bunny: I'm Bunny.

Author: (rolls eyes) and?

Bunny: Gimme sweet snow.

Author: (hands over bowl of icecream)

Bunny: I'm 4"9

Setsuna: (cough) short! (cough, cough)

Bunny: (glares at Setsuna) and I have violent tendancies.

Author: Raye?

Raye: Hiya! I'm Raye Hataru Hellsing! I'm 6"1 and I like sugar! But I'm kinda disturbed.

Author: Now to the ones you havent seen in almost all of my fics!

Tempest: My age is 16 in demon years, though only 361 in human years. I'm 5"9, with long fire red and yellow hair and bright green eyes. I'm a Muse by profession and I see, and talk to, dead people. Guns Don't kill people, I do. (smiles)

Author: Ookay. Little bit of trivia? This is in reality my older sister. See what I have to put up with?

Rosa: I am 17 in demon years, 782 in human. I'm 5'4. I have black hair with red high lights. I'm a magic user who weilds a scythe aaaand… I'm not afraid of dying but I'm scared as Hell of Death.

Author: Wow. A slightly normal intro…

Mimi: I'm 18 in demon years (that's 798 in human years). I have brown hair and eyes. My birthday's on June 23. My favorite colour is pink. I use spirit energy…

Author: Stop! No more! You're not aloud that much info!

Mimi: That's not what The Rules say!!

Author: She's dating Takishi who you will meet next chapter… annnnnyway…

Christar: …

Author: Come on Chris! For me (puppy dog eyes)

Christar: 5"6, 16/752, Blackish Blue hair, Blackish Green hair. If you go fast enough can you escape reality?

Author: thank you!

Catty: I have Dark blonde hair and Hazel eyes. I'm 5"6 and I can read your mind O.O. I like video games and skateboards. If it don't have wheels and cant go fast I'm not riding it!

Author: Last chapter you saw (or read rather) her mad skilz. She's dating Dan who is our brother, she's just the girl.

Van: I don't have to do this.

Author: Yes you do or else I'll kick your ass. You may be taller than me but you're still just a boy. My cousin (in reality, though bro here) Van!

Van: sighs 5'7, spiky silver hair, red eyes, control fire and i like video games.

Author: thank you was that so hard?

Pooky: Hi! You can call me Poe if you want to! I'm 5'3, have green hair and eyes, I use magic. And…. Wait… Dude where's my car?

Author: Do you even have a car?

Shorty: I'm 5'6, have blue hair and eyes, I'm 13 in demon years (Pooky's 10) I also use magic! We are all animals at heart!

Author: so true!

B.B.: I'm Blue Bear! I'm 5'7, I have pink hair and blue eyes. I can morph into other animals and I look 12! YAY!

Author: ow. I think you broke the sound barriar.

Bobby:… (pokes author who was rithing in pain)

Author: Oh yeah. This is Silent Bobby! She's 4'9, Has brown hair and green eyes, She doesn't speak… though she does shrug and raise her eyebrow!

Bobby: (shrugs and raises eyebrow)

Author: isn't she cool?

Amy: I have black hair and eyes, I'm five foot seven, my favorite colour is baby blue…

Author: And she's dating Vash… who'll you'll meet eventually

Amy: uh-hu. Now leave me to my hotdogs.

Pheo: I'm 4'6, around 18 looking, have silver blue hair and red eyes with a wing shaped pupil. And Sticks and stones may brake my bones but words can break my soul

Nix: I'm Pheo's friend.

Pheo: come on Nix! You can think of more!

Nix: I'm also 4'6, have black hair with red tips and red eyes with black stripes. I look like I'm 17.

Author: (whispering) Don't tell them this… but if you put their names together it makes Phoenix… O.o o.O

Mina: I'm 6'7

Author: OH MY FREEKING GOD YOUR TALLL!!!

Mina: Like, whatever. I look like 17, I have blonde hair and blue eyes and I like LOVE pink!

Author: (muttering) OMFGeezies she's tall… oh and eventually she dates Jin…Gods she's tall

Dan: I'm six foot. I have brown hair and blue eyes, I look 15 and I'm a JedI!

Author: He dates Catty.

Umi: I'm 4'7

Author: (pokes her) you're short!

Umi: glances at author I didn't see that commin'. I have blue hair and eyes. I control water, And I look about 9.

Author: she's not actually a sister, just Yota's girlfriend.

Yota: I'm 4'5 (braces self)

Author: OH MY FREEKING GOSH YOU'RE A MIDGET!!

Yota: (said quickly) I have red hair and blue eyes, I look about nine And I kill people with swords.

Author: dayum we have short people in our family. Then we have really tall people like Mina and Sets'. Where did they get those genes?

Luna: I'm 5'4, have blue hair and eyes, appear 14, And my power is singing

Setsuna: (pats her on the shoulder) She's not actually our family, just Alex's girlfriend. Which mean she cant boss us around. (sticks out toungue)

Luna: (yelling) If you do that again I'll ground you for a month!!

Setsuna: (goes up to Author) Okie I did what you asked, now hand it over

Author: (hands over vodka) Okay, she's um… Luna.

Alex: I'm 5'9, appear 14, have brown hair and green eyes. I have a spirit dragon!

Author: yes he does. It's cool.

Jamina: 5'7, black hair and brown hair, I appear to be 16, I like Lime green

Author: that's all you've already met. Now onto people you don't know!

Metze: I am 5'4, I have neon green hair and eyes, I appear to be 14, and I like red and black

Author: and he dates Mate!

Mate: I appear to be 14 with black hair, I control roses, and my birthday is April 1.

Author: she's not really related to us, but she is Australian!

Takishi: Hi Groovy dudes and dudettes! I am 3'2

Author: AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! THE MIDGETS ARE ATTACKING!!

Takishi: I like LOVE rainbows! I look 12 and I have green eyes.

Author: He's not related to us, he dates Mimi. (whispers) and he's creepy.

Jahna-Alexander: …

Author: I'll give you a new toy if you talk.

Jahna-Alexander: (suddenly has kitty ears and a tail and is in chibi form) I'm 5'8, Have green-blue hair and eyes, I like Ramen and I can turn into a kitty!

Author: Here you go (hands over a flame thrower)

Jahna-Alexander: YAY! (suddenly his kitty ears and tail dissapear) When you die do you think you think your life really does flash before your Eyes? What if you never had a life?

Author: okie. That's everyone thus far. I'm not introducing the 'rents yet cause I don't wanna. I hope this cleared things up a bit! Oh yeah. If you steel any of my characters I will hunt you down and kick your ass. I will cut out your eyes, then your nose, then all your fingers and toes. I WONT cut off your ears because then you can hear every child cry and every woman screem "dear god what is that thing??" If you want to you can ASKKKKKK me and I'll let you use one if you REALLLY REALLLY like it but in every chapter that he/she is in you must mention that he/she is mine. I don't really think that you'd steal them or anything like that but I'm paranoid by nature sooo…. Yeah. This chappy is DONE. Hope it helped!


	32. Bad Dudes

Setsuna and Yusuke

Setsuna pulled herself up into a sitting position. "That was fun, let's do that again!"

"How about not." groaned Yusuke.

"You alright, mates?" asked a concerned voice above them.

"Don't worry about them Metze, knowing my sister she probably caused the explosion." a cross voice explained.

"Hey I know that voice!" said Setsuna, looking up. "Metze and Mate, what the hell are you doing here?" In front of them stood a thirteen year old girl with long black hair and green eyes. She had on a long emerald green skirt with a button up velvet green shirt that covered her five foot two frame. Black boots covered her feet. Her face was pouting in a thoughtful expression.

The thirteen year old boy beside her had neon green hair and eyes, which stood out on his dark skin. He was only a tiny bit taller than her and was wearing black Goth pants, complete with straps and chains, and an Ozzy shirt.

Slightly behind them stood a very short seven year old, measuring in only about three foot two. He had dark hair with a type of star pattern and melon green eyes. He was wearing yellow bellbottoms and a tie-dye shirt.

Beside him, looking out of place, was a man with green-blue spiked hair and matching eyes. He was around five foot eight and had a very slight tan. He was wearing jeans and a white t-shirt under a black trench coat. He had an eyebrow and lip piercing as well as a few on his ears. His feet were covered in Harley boots.

"And Takashi and Jahna-Alexander! What are you guys doing here?" asked Setsuna pleasantly as she stood. From the wrecked building behind her, another explosion sounded. "Or maybe we should save pleasantries for later."

In the Cave

"Well, well what do we have here?" a voice said from the roof. Everyone's head turned simultaneously to see a man floating in air. The man had very long white hair and looked obviously Hispanic. He had on a metal breastplate that fit snugly to his chest. His legs were covered in leather, his shoes tall and stiff boots. He wore a dark cape that made his long hair stand out in contrast. His eyes were dark as night. A sword graced his hip.

"Who the hell are you?" demanded Van.

"Me? I am Armand!" DUN-DUN-DUUUUUN!

Everyone's head whipped around. "You have a sound track?" asked Bunny, raising an eyebrow. "That's kind of stupid."

Armand's eyes narrowed and he said with utmost seriousness "You are just jealous you were not graced with a body such as mine."

Everyone sweat dropped. "Um is he crazy?" Mimi asked Rosa.

"The question is does he really expect us to fight him. Wouldn't he cry if he broke a nail?" Rosa whispered.

"SILENCE! YOU WILL COWER IN MY PRESENCE LIKE THE FLEAS YOU ARE!" he bellowed.

"Excuse you?" Raye said miffed. "Who are you callin' a flea?"

"Oh Snap, he's in for it now!" B.B. smiled.

In the Greek Arena

The group all spun around, seeing a figure step out of the shadows. He was wearing a gray trench coat, closed over pinstripe pants. He was wearing a fedora, pulled down to hide his eyes. In his hands was a cigarette. He threw it to the ground then pushed back the fedora, revealing bright green eyes and a smile. "So I was sent here to kill you. You want to get on with it?"

Everyone did an anime fall. "That's it? Aren't you people supposed to do the whole witty repartee thing?" Pheo looked dumbfounded.

"Well I thought the dramatic entrance would be enough. You want to talk a bit first?" He said, still smiling.

"Why are you working for the dark side? And what does the dark side want with my family?" Dan demanded.

"The dark side?" the man in the fedora looked Dan over. "Oh you mean Star Wars! I was more of a Humphrey Bogart man myself. In fact that's my name. I'm Bogart. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too." said Mina amiably. Catty reached over and smacked her in the back of the head. "Ow!" Mina cried.

"You're not supposed to make nice with the enemy!" Complained Catty.

"Oh don't worry, I'm a generally nice guy, besides this is only my day job. I'm really a Mystery writer. But being an evil dude pays more right now."

During his speech more and more sweat drops appeared on the heads of the Hellsing family.

In the Haunted House

"And how do you suppose we do that if we don't even know where the bad guy ass is?" asked Yota.

"Um… follow the tracks until we find the control station?" suggested Alex.

"Good idea!" said Shorty, starting off.

"Um what about everyone else here?" asked Luna, indicating the humans.

"I'll take care of it." Jamina waved her hand and the group of frightened preteens disappeared. Everyone looked at her and she explained "I transported them outside of the ride."

"But still in this world right?" Umi asked.

"Of course." Jamina said crossly.

"Just making sure." Umi said, trying to smooth away the anger.

They began walking the tracks. The only light was the flash light and three witch lights in the colours of lime green, blue and orange that Jamina, Shorty and Pooky conjured.

Noise sounded in the distance and Shorty grabbed hold of Pooky. "Was that thunder?" she asked, frightened.

"That can't be, it wasn't storming earlier" said Pooky.

It sounded again, closer. Shorty squealed "It is thunder!"

"It's fine. It's just noise. Ignore it.

"Did it suddenly get hot in here?" asked Umi.

Everyone stopped for a second. "Yeah." Luna said wearily. "It is getting a bit warm.

"What the hell is going on here?" Alex asked to no one in particular. "Something is happening and I am not liking it."

* * *

Author: Notes

1) Metze and Mate are Raye's characters

2) Takishi is Bunny's

3) Jahna-Alexander is mine.

4) Armand amuses the hell out of me

5) Raye has split personality disorder. One minute she's the sugar-hyped child but if you get her angry… well… run like hell…

6) I 3 Bogart. I want one so badly. He's awesome


	33. Ground Control to Major Tom

Author: Yay! Another action packed episode of Violence, Booze, and too much Family!! In this episode we will meet another ghost from the Hellsing's past! The reason why you should NEVER piss Raye off! The Return of Tempest Hellsing! And last, but not least, EVEN MORE SIBLINGS!!! The sad thing is… there are even more to come…

Ma'ax: (to Setsuna) what was with your parent's were they nympho's or something?

Setsuna: (takes a drag off her cigarette) Yeah, where do you think I got it from?

Author: By the by, Ma'ax is another one of my personalities. I remembered her recently. YAY!

* * *

With Setsuna

Out of the ruble and fire stepped out a dark figure, framed in the chaos behind him. He appeared dark as shadow, though all could tell he was tall. He seemed strong, with his shoulders thrown back, and his head held aloft.

He stepped closer, out of the glare of the flame behind him. This revealed him to be nothing more than a teenage boy. He was wearing torn jeans and scuffed up tennis shoes. His T-shirt was grey and unadorned. Brown hair hung into his ice blue eyes, the only colour on him.

Setsuna's eyes widened "Dartagnan?" she said, surprised

In the Cave

Raye was pissed. Okay, that was an understatement, she was Mundo pissed. Uber pissed-off. Luckily, the anger was directed at the enemy.

She launched herself into the air, using her demon like strength to propel her into the evil man known as Armand. Her hand grabbed his throat and she kept going, crashing the object of her anger into a wall.

She glared, looking into the panicked eyes in front of her. "Who's the flee now bitch?"

"I shall never be as low as you are. For I am more beautiful than you could hope to be." Armand said cheekily

Raye snorted. "In your dreams. I bet you were a fat kid with acne weren't you?"

The bad guy paled "How did you know? I promised myself that no one would ever find that out! Why you… you… WHORE!!"

Raye's eyes turned to slits with anger as the cave blew up.

In the arena

Bogart's watch went off. "Huh. Well that's all the time I have for chit-chat. I will be killing you now." he said. His hand swiped the air and energy balls flew at the group.

Pheo's hand flew out, stopping the balls of death with a powerful wind.

When it died down Bogart smiled "Good move. Look down."

The silvery haired teen looked down, then felt something grab her. It was her own shadow! The other's experienced similar feelings as all of their shadows turned against them.

Nix laughed, causing the enemy to look at him "What's funny?"

"The fact that you used such a cheep parlor trip. You may control shadows, but how do your shadows deal with… darkness?" no sooner had the words left his mouth, that all light around the group was extinguished. Without light, there can be no shadow. This still posed a problem as no one could see where the other was.

A thumping sound was heard and a feminine voice said "You can turn the lights back on now, Hun."

Light returned. In front of them struggled Bogart, who was being hold back by none other than Tempest Hellsing. She had her hair of fire down, cut in a cute bob. Her bangs contrasted with her normally bright green eyes, that were slightly discolored do to the fact that they were behind rimless rose colored sunglasses. Black leather pants that looked pored on led the eye down to hot pink platform boots. Her shirt matched the theme, being a pleather material that zipped all the way up her neck. It was hot pink with black stripes going up the side.

Beside her stood a silent eighteen year old with spiky blonde hair and bright blue eyes hidden behind green sunglasses. He was wearing a long red trench coat, standing out against the blackness of the rest of his clothes.

"Vash!" Amy cried out, launching herself at the man. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to help." he said with a French accent.

It is at that point Bogart struggles his way out of Tempest's grasp. "Enough with this! I wont get paid unless I beat you guys. It's time to get serious!" He threw off his fedora then his trench coat. Underneath was revealed a huge gun that looked more like a cannon. He grabbed Mina, pointing it at her head.

In the Haunted House

The group walked on, being careful of where they stepped. Everyone was jumpy. The group was led by Jamina and her red witch light. Behind her walked Umi and Yota. Slightly behind them was Pooky. To close the group was Luna and Alex, hand in hand, and Shorty.

Thunder crackled again, causing Shorty to eep and huddle closer to Luna. Luna put her arm around Shorty, offering comfort.

Jamina stumbled, coming to a stop. Her witch light dipped down, revealing the ground to be sand. The red of the light cast an eerie glow, making it look faintly like blood.

"What the hell is going on?" demanded Yota.

"We'll know when we reach the control room." said Shorty, straightening up against Luna.

"Look up there!" Umi said, gesturing to the ceiling. Everyone looked up and what they saw was even more bizarre than the sand. The ceiling had disappeared! In it's place were stars and even planets close up. It looked like they were in space. If it weren't for the sand at their feet they would have sworn they had taken orbit. Yota grabbed onto Umi, tightening his grip. Everyone was shaken.

"Don't you see what's happening? He's feeding on your fears!" said a voice to the left.

"You'd think they'd know that, it is after all the oldest trick in the book!" a voice to the right replied.

"I know that voice." said Jamina "Juan, get your ass over here!" out of the shadows stepped a seventeen year old Porter Rican. He had black hair, slicked back, and dark brown eyes. He was wearing baggy black pants, barely held up by a belt, and a t-shirt.

To the other side stepped out a seventeen year old with short black hair and brown eyes. He was wearing a tux. At his side a white witch light burned to life.

The Hispanic man wore a smirk at his lips as he walked over to a frowning Jamina. "What's up babe?" Jamina's hand went out like a flash and smacked him on the face.

"You were supposed to meet me an hour ago." she chastised.

Juan rubbed his mouth. "Sorry."

Damian came over to the others and began to explain the situation. "The reason all of these strange things keep happening is because there's a black aura around the whole haunted house. Whoever put it there feeds on fear. He's turning your fears into a reality.

"That explains the thunder." Shorty said, nodding.

"And the sand and heat, I'm afraid of deserts. And Yota's afraid of being lost in space, hence the constellations above us." Umi explained.

"We'll just have to face our fears and find this guy before anything really bad can happen." Luna said, tightening her hand around Alex's. Worry filled her eyes.

* * *

Author: Notes…

1) Ha! Dartagnan amuses me…

2) Never call Raye a whore.

3) Tempest is my sister… I think I already told you that…

4) Vash is Raye's… Does he remind you of a certain male who's hair resembles a broom?

5) I want Bogy's gun… really badly…

6) Juan and Damian are Raye's


	34. Revenge

Author: (staring blankly at the television screen biting her lip in concentration while playing a video game)

Raye: um… whatcha doin' Author-chan.

Author: playing "Fable"

Raye: but… Um… you don't like videogames…

Bunny: I got her hooked (grins evilly)

Author: cause she's mean! and I'm going to kill her after I kill this stupid dirt monster DIE YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKER!! (video game makes noise and skull appears on screen) NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! HOW DARE YOU KILL ME YOU EVIL MOTHER FUCKER!!!!

Bunny: you got killed by the dirt monster? That's so easy.

Author: (turns around pointing and glaring) you don't say a word. I haven't played a videogame in five years! And YOU got me hooked so there. You suck.

Setsuna: um… are you going to introduce the chapter.

Author: (turning back to her game) make Bunny do it.

Bunny: Ookay. This is the 33rd chapter of Violence, Booze, and too much Family. It was really hard for Marie to come up with this chapter as her brain is focused on video games.

Raye: but I'm making her cause she hasn't updated in so long.

Setsuna: so blame them if it sucks.

* * *

Setsuna

The teenage boy in front of them smiled coldly. "Nice to see you again Sets'."

Setsuna had a deadpanned expression on her face. "YOU COULD HAVE KILLED ME YOU IDIOT! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU??" she yelled, glaring angrily at the boy.

"What? Me kill the invincible, all power Setsuna Hellsing? I thought you were better than me in every way." he said sarcastically.

"Oh god. You are not still angry at me. That was five demon years ago! Get over it!" she said, voice full of scorn.

"Get over it? GET OVER IT?? You humiliated me! You broke my heart and then humiliated me!"

"I was twelve! I didn't know what I was doing! I was self-obsessed and immature."

Dartagnan crossed his arms. "It doesn't matter. You hurt me and now I'm going to hurt you."

In the cave

The mountain that once was a roller coaster was now nothing but rubble. A large rock flew up from a pile, being launched in the air by a disk made of energy. Smaller rocks and bits of the roller coaster began to fly off, a red energy surrounding them. The seven Hellsing's stood, scratches and bruises littering their bodies.

"Whoa. What a rush." Raye said, standing up. She almost fell back, but was caught by Kurama.

"Oh… make the world stop spinning." her mouth was turned in a lopsided grin.

"That's not the world Raye-chan. That's your head. I think you might have lost a few brain cells. What were you thinking?" Bunny demanded.

"I got us out didn't I?" Raye said, leaning against Kurama.

"And you sent us a flair to find you. Although I would have expected this to be more Bunny's style than yours!" a voice behind them said.

They twirled to see a ten year old boy with a lopsided grin. He had blonde hair and blue eyes. He was wearing a white shirt and black pants with a black vest.

The girl beside him was nine and had red hair and brown eyes. She wore jeans and a red t-shirt. She had her arms crossed and was frowning.

"Bui! You're so mean!" Raye said.

"I am not, I was telling the truth." the brother named Bui said. "Ruri and I were looking for you, and as soon as we saw a building blow up we knew where you were."

Raye stuck her tongue out at him, still hanging on to Kurama.

"We better find the others." Rosa said.

"Yeah, who knows what kind of trouble Setsuna got herself into if the 'rents sent the whole family here after us."

"How do you know Setsuna's in trouble?" Mimi asked.

Bunny gave her a look "Duh. It's always Setsuna's fault."

At the Arena

"Now what we are going to do is that you guys are going to get in a line and stay there. Or you can try and rush me and I'll blow this girl's head off. Okay?"

"What happened to 'I'm a generally nice guy'? Blowing a nice chick's head off ain't nice!" Pheo pointed out.

"Yes well, it's a dog eat dog world. Now get in a line!" he commanded. No one made a move. "Get in a line!!" he yelled, all the shadows in the area came at his call and chained the group together, putting them in a perfect line.

"Now. Let's go take you to the boss-man."

In the Haunted house

The group continued on as their surroundings got stranger and stranger. By this time the whole floor was sand and thunder filled the air every few minuets. Planets appeared to get closer, and at times it looked like one would crash down on them.

All of the sudden the four witch lights began to flicker. "What the hell?" Jamina demanded. It was then the lights lost control. They started bouncing off the walls, and chasing each other. They came together to make a black ball of energy. The ball grew inside and flew straight at Juan. He ducked, swearing in Spanish.

"I can't control the power! Run!" Jamina yelled.

They took off running down the tunnel. "What the hell's going on?" Shorty demanded.

"Juan's afraid of magic." Jamina explained. "But right now, that doesn't matter, what does is getting out of it's way!"

"There's the control room!" pointed Umi. They all sped up, but it was getting harder to move. It almost felt like they were floating.

"The gravity is going down!" Luna said.

"HURRY!" Pooky yelled.

Jamina reached the door and threw it open. They tumbled into the room and as the last person fell in the door closed, right before the witch light reached them.

They lie on the floor panting for a moment, trying to collect themselves.

"So, you made it. Congratulations."

* * *

Author: note time!

1) When Setsuna says she was 12 when she dated Dartagnan she means 12 in demon years. In human years she was around… late 600's… something like that… I have a sheet somewhere that has all the calculations but I'm too lazy to find it. Oh and when I say demon years I don't actually mean demon years. The Hellsings have their own age… thingy… cause their father is part demon and their mother is from the Lunar race… eventually I'll write a fic about that. Eventually.

2) Bui and Ruri are Raye's characters

3) It is always Setsuna's fault


	35. Love and Redemption

Setsuna

"God man. What is with my exes? Do I just date mentally insane people with really bad dialog?"

Yusuke's eyebrow twitches as he glares at Setsuna. As soon as she noticed her faux pas she grins sheepishly "Except for you of course…"

"Enough of this! I will teach you that you should NEVER mess with Dartagnan!" The air around the group began to collapse upon itself, sufficiently suffocating the group. As they struggled to breathe, their vision began to go white.

Suddenly, their ears popped as the air resumed it's normal tension. They collapsed, their lungs focusing only on trying to get as much air as possible.

Cave… or… where the cave would be…

"Does anyone remember where Setsuna wanted to go?" Rosa asked.

"Well, let's think about our darling sister. Where would an alcoholic, narcissistic, mentally insane, nympho want to go while at a circus?" Van mused.

Bunny and Raye gave each other a look "Hall of mirrors!"

It is at this point in time the rubble behind them began to shift. A disheveled and pissed-off Armand rose from the destroyed roller coaster. "Look at what you did to me! I am looking forward to seeing what Dartagnan chooses to do with you." he smiled evilly.

"Uh… did he just say Dartagnan?" Raye whispered to Bunny.

"Yep… we are so in for it now…" They both swallowed.

Armand suddenly went flying, propelled by a bolt of light. That light had come from a laser gun in Bui's hand. "Are we gonna go save 'Suna or not?" he said.

They took off running in the direction of the hall of mirrors.

Arena

The group headed off with little persuasion from the man with a gun.

"Soo…" Tempest said. "Do you guys have a specific reason for terrorizing a circus or do you just have a complex or something?"

Bogart grinned. "It was a trap to lead you guys here."

"How the hell did you know we would be here?" Pheo asked

"And why would you want us?" Nix added.

Bogart shrugged "You'd have to ask Boss-man the why. As to how, how else would you attract bored teens?"

"The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is. Just lucky you were." Dan said.

His siblings sweat dropped.

"So who is your boss?" Amy asked.

"Ah, well it's a surprise." Bogart said with a wink.

"I hate surprises." Vash mumbled.

Haunted house

Everyone twirled to see their tormenter. He had straight black hair that went to his shoulders to frame his pale face. His dark purple eyes were cold as he watched the group. At first he seemed to be a shadow, as he was dressed all in black. However, as he stepped forward into the light he became all too real.

"You're the one who's been messing with us!" Jamina accused.

He made a little bow. "None other." he said in a slightly English accent.

"Why?" Shorty asked.

He shrugged "That's just what I'm paid to do."

"You did all this for money? Just how low can you get." Juan said with a discussed look on his face.

"If I were you I wouldn't be so bold, as you are at my mercy." he said a witch light appearing in his palm.

Luna stepped in front of the group, a flute in her hands. "You may be able to exploit our fear, but we are far from at your mercy."

All of the sudden Alex doubled over in pain. "Oh?" the man in black said. "Are you quite sure?"

Luna's blue eyes darkened as she put the flute to her lips. A C sharp rang out, soon followed by a B and a D. A ball of light appeared in front of her and flew at the man in black. He was slammed into the wall. With the impact he lost his concentration and his hold on Alex.

When he got back to his feet Luna smiled coldly. "Do not mess with me or mine. You will regret it deeply."

In one fluid movement he was in front of her. In the blink of an eye she went flying, her flute falling from her hands. As soon as it touched the floor it disappeared in a puff of smoke. She touched her nose and saw that it was bleeding.

Alex appeared in front of their foe, a sword in hand. As his down stroke was about to separate the man from his head, a sword rose to block his. The man grunted and pushed, separating the two blades.

A rumbling noise was emitted from the walls. "Something just exploded near us. It's going to bring the building down around us!" Darian yelled over the racket.

"Damn. Jamina get us out of here!" Yota cursed.

"Gladly." she said before they disappeared.

* * *

Author: notes notes notes!

1) Setsuna doesn't think before she speaks.

2) What Dan says is a Star Wars quote and then he speaks "Yota speak" for a second. He's a nerd. I guess I am to for writing it…

3) Luna makes magic using music… yeah she's THAT cool.

4) Dartagnan: Leader

5) Armand: of the Army

6) Bogart: strong as a bow (though the reason I used this name was for Humphrey Bogart)

7) Corbin (fear guy): Raven


	36. FINAL CHAPTER!

The air popped and nine Hellsings fell from the sky. At the same time nine others ran into the clearing, panting. A second later nine more were led by a man in a fedora. Finally they were all together.

Dartagnan turned to them, a dark expression crossing his face "Armand and Corbin." he said calmly. Armand and the dark man from the haunted house appeared. "You lost your charges." he said.

The two men nodded, not looking him in the eye "I lost them but for a minuet." Armand said.

"I was just about to come after them." Corbin added.

"Don't disappoint me again." their boss said.

Bogart cleared his throat "Uh… Boss-man? How long is this all going to take? I'm going to be late for a meeting with my publisher."

"It won't take too long." Dartagnan said, turning back to Setsuna. "Now, everyone together." All of the family got together in one group; Raye, Bunny, and Setsuna in the front.

Bunny glanced at her sisters "You know, mom's gonna get pissed at us if we die."

Setsuna grinned "Yeah, and Dad'll have to deal with her and the triplets by himself."

Raye pouted "And the triplets will have to grow up without their older siblings. That's not very fair."

It was as if the magic words were spoken. A portal opened and out walked a woman with long wavy blonde hair pulled back from her face in a half pony tail. Her eyes were a deep amethyst, contrasting to her pale skin. She was extremely tall and slender, accented by the baby blue bodice of her gown. The gown looked as if it were stolen from Camelot, as the jeweled bodice led to overflowing skirts. The neckline was low and jewel covered while the sleeves went past her fingertips. Her face held a royal look as she walked like a queen.

To her right walked the man recognized as Gregory, the father of the Hellsing children. His purple hair barely hid the green velvet cloth that covered his eyes. He wore a dark blue silk shirt with loose sleeves covering his arms and almost covering his hands. It was tucked into dark green linen pants that were tucked into black knee-high boots. His tan skin looked creamy close to such bright colours. A grin graced his lips.

To her left floated three toddlers. The one girl had short violet and blonde hair that accentuated rather than hid her violet eyes. She wore a blue shirt that hid her crossed legs from view. A cat's tail and ears twitched, making her look a little less human. One of the boys had short black hair with a white streak down the right side. His eyes tilted up, which mixed with the colour of green made him look feline. He was also cross-legged, though he wore a black t-shirt and purple shorts. As he yawned, fangs flashed. The last of the triplets had shoulder-length white hair and black eyes. Grey pants were his only clothes. Stuck in his mouth was a peppermint stick.

Once everyone was out of the portal it disappeared. The woman opened her mouth to speak "Dartagnan Nichole McElder. What would your mother think if I told her that you were making your life as a villain?"

Gregory shook his head "I am so disappointed that you would choose this career."

The lackeys laughed but when Dartagnan glared at them they stopped "Mrs. Hellsing, Mr. Hellsing I'm sorry but this really doesn't concern you. This is just between Setsuna and I. The rest of your children just tagged along."

"That's because Koenma has put out a warrant for your arrest, and since all of my children except the triplets are spirit detectives they all came to arrest you."

Raye, Bunny and Setsuna as well as the original spirit detectives all gapped at the Hellsing mother "We're ALL spirit detectives???"

Their mother tilted her head to one side "Yes… didn't you know that?"

"NO!" they said.

"Although that does make sense…" Setsuna said thoughtfully.

"He played us from the beginning. Making us think it was just you three!" Yusuke said angrily.

"Uh… excuse me… Evil Villain here?" Dartagnan got their attention.

"Why did you become an Evil Villain anyway?" Raye asked.

"Well… with a name like Dartagnan do you blame me for being a bit fucked up?"

They all nodded sagely. "Your parents were a bit odd." the Hellsing mother said.

Dartagnan shook himself. "Well anyway. That doesn't matter anymore. In a minuet this part of time and space will be obliterated. Oh and you'll find you wont be able to time warp out. Sorry you all have to be blinked out of existence. I was just going to get Setsuna but… well… you all kinda tagged along."

Everyone gaped at him "WHAT?"

"Dude not cool! I have a meeting in five minuets!" Bogart said

"I'm too pretty to die!" Armand exclaimed.

"This was not what I signed up for." Corbin groaned.

Raye glanced at her mother. She nodded back. "Sorry everyone." she said.

Kurama looked over at her "Why?"

Everything went black.

When they woke up they were all in an abandoned theatre with Koenma on the stage. "Ah it looks like you're all awake, good. Raye-chan said you'd wake up soon."

"What happened?" Catty asked.

"I had to shut your consciousness off so that mom could reconfigure time and space." Raye explained "She couldn't let your minds disrupt her work, which it would have done. She had to have ultimate control."

Everyone nodded as if they understood.

"What happened to the Evil Dudes?" Takishi asked.

"Oh good question." Koenma said. He opened a cat carrier. Out walked two white cats and two black cats. He pointed to the first white cat. "That is Dartagnan."

"Who I named Nee'chee!" Raye said proudly.

He pointed to the next white cat "That is Armand."

"Also known as Josephine." Raye smiled wickedly.

The first black cat was indicated "That is Bogart."

"or Aubrey"

"I guess he never made it to his meeting." Setsuna hazarded.

Then the last black cat was pointed out "And that is Corbin.

"or Sabbath!" Raye exclaimed "We get to keep them, right Setsuna?"

"I don't know Raye…"

"PLEASE???" She looked at her sisters with puppy dog eyes.

"Okay. Fine."

"Cool."

The mother of all Hellsings walked on stage. Koenma bowed to her "Thank you for your help Gwenafar."

"You are most welcome Koenma Jr. It was my pleasure." she turned to the crowd. "And thank you children. You did most well. Everyone may now go back home for some refreshments… all except Bunny, Raye, Setsuna and their friends. You six come to the front please."

Soon the they were all alone. The girls stood in a line in front of their mother, their beaus behind them. "First of all, I believe you left one of your friends tide to a chair in your house?"

They exchanged glances "Oopse… poor Kuwabara." Raye said.

"Now, try not to let that happen again."

"Yes ma'am."

"Second, I'm glad you were able to make friends. You three sometimes can be so anti-social. And third I believe you guys need a vacation. You are relieved of your duties for a while, why don't you guys go someplace you've never been before?" she said smiling.

"Thanks mom." Setsuna said.

"Of course, honey. I'll leave you alone now." she walked out of the theatre.

The girls turned to their boys "How does Cancun sound?" Setsuna asked.

"Whatever. I don't care as long as I get to sleep." Yusuke said.

"Aw but sleeping is so unfun!" she said smiling.

"Oh I don't know, I guess it depends on who you're sleeping with." he grinned.

She playfully slapped him before dragging him into a kiss.

Raye looked up at Kurama "Sorry you almost got killed." she said.

"It's okay. It happens all the time." he said, leaning down to kiss her.

Bunny raised an eyebrow at Hiei "So… you want to say something sappy like these losers or do you just wanna make out?"

Before she could blink his lips were pressed against hers.

The wind pushed hard against the couples. This was kind of odd because they were in a building. It was also kind of strange that the air kept on blowing harder and harder. It also felt like it was sucking more than blowing.

Raye's eyes widened as she realized what was going on "Oh crap."

It hit Bunny next "Oh man I am so going to never talk to mom again."

Setsuna remained blissfully unaware as she proceeded to cling onto Yusuke. Soon it became unignorable as her feet were lifted from the ground "What the… oh FUCK!"

Bunny, Raye and Setsuna were being sucked into a portal. They tried to keep a hold of their spirit detectives, but finally the portal won. The last thing they saw were hands trying to grab hold of them.

END

* * *

Author: I know. I suck ass. Big fat monkey ass.

Setsuna: WHY DID YOU END THAT??? I WAS ABOUT TO GET LAID!!

Author: I'm sorry, but an idea hit me and I had to have you in another dimension.

Raye: I hate it when that happens.

Author: so if you want to see what happens next go see my BRAND NEW story The Hellsings go to Hogwarts… oh yeah… I went there…

Willow: Notes… the last ones…

1) Gwen, Gregory, and the triplets were all created by moi. I'm special.

2) Yeah, they are all spirit detectives. That was my intention all along. Remember, the reason I started writing this story is so I could have a quiz "Which member of the Hellsing sibling are you?" which I will start on now that this is done. Look for it on Quizilla, I am VampireBelleMorte

3) Raye made me turn them into cats. It's her not me

4) Raye has super mind powers. That's how come she was able to do what she did.

5) If any of you would like to become a member of the Hellsing family, message me! I will give you a form to fill out (name, favourite colour etc) and you shall become a sibling. WOOT!


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